a dude rancher, writer of those catchy advertising jingles, featured as the King of Clubs in the "Most Notorious/Most Wanted" deck of cards, the in-house Pro at the local archery range, judge, jury, and executioner just like Judge Dredd, a Monday morning armchair quarterback, a consultant/analyst for the Food Network, a gummy bear, the kid on the front of the Kraft Macaroni and Cheese box, the owner of a local tavern so I can sponsor an adult softball team comprised of former Major League Baseball players, lookin' stylish in Hammer pants, insane in the membrane, shrunk by Rick Moranis and lost in my own backyard, a college graduate in Spring 2006, an ice cream flavor like Cherry Garcia or Phish Phood, Obi-Wan Kenobi's apprentice, an early visitor to the newest Jurassic Park, rebuilt with technology to be better, stronger, faster, an iconic 1980's wrestler like Macho Man Randy Savage or the Ultimate Warrior, a railroad conductor (woo woo!), a muppet/puppet performer on Sesame Street or Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood, along with Chris Lomascola "Two Wild and Crazy Guys!", at Denny's to order one Moons Over Mi-Hami, able to come up with new things that I want to be every month instead of every other month...
(to be continued)
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