The Drive to Stay Alive Ep. 23 - I Only Gamble With My Life

I've had a lot of very interesting days in my life - some good and some bad. I like to try and forget the bad ones even though they are ingrained in my memory. The good ones I don't want to ever forget. But what about the ones that were equally as good and bad? What should I do about those days? I should share them with you. You're welcome in advance. This episode is a departure from the normal structure of this podcast but I had to do something like this again after I had so much fun with it last time I was in Las Vegas. If you listened to Episode 19 - Operation Dawn (which was recorded in March 2013 on my first night out there for a friend's wedding) then you know exactly how this one is going to turn out. The title of this episode comes from 1999's The Mummy. In it, Rick O'Connell (Brendan Fraser) is asked to join in a card game, to which he responds, "I only gamble with my life, never my money." I wish I was the same way, especially after this recent adventure. The truth is that I'm a gambling addict and I can't stay away from Las Vegas even though she repeatedly steals money from my wallet and leaves me lying unsatisfied in a drunken stupor. But like someone in an abused relationship, they go against their better judgment and keep coming back.

This was on the tail end of my trip down to Arizona to watch the Milwaukee Brewers play some Spring Training baseball. It was my plan all along to make the 5 hour drive to Las Vegas but I didn't plan on getting my ass kicked on the first night. I guess I was just ready to blow off some steam and I hit the ground running pretty hard. I was way too drunk to remember to record that night, so I did it the following night when I went to Planet Hollywood. I apologize if I sound a little down but I definitely wasn't as drunk as the night before (no one should ever be), I had already lost all of my allocated gambling money and I had arrived at this casino only to find they removed my Penguin slot machine where I could sit and creepily ogle the scantily clad dancing girls. That was my favorite spot in all of Las Vegas. But I decided to record anyway, and the result is still highly entertaining. 

This podcast is actually 3 separate recordings stitched together. The first 32 minutes were recorded at Planet Hollywood on Monday March 17 while playing some Caesar age of the Roman Empire type slot machine. The next 15 minutes were recorded on Sunday March 16 at the Plaza Casino downtown at like 3 in the morning while playing some slot machine next to some random girl. The last 8 minutes are at 4 in the morning on that same night when I was just about to pass out from a long night of drinking and gambling. I know it's not in the right order as far as when they were recorded, but in some drunken way it kind of makes sense. So kick back, open up a beverage (of the alcoholic kind if you're not at work) and get ready for what I think about when I'm in Las Vegas:

Right click and Save As to download a copy of The Drive to Stay Alive Ep. 23 - I Only Gamble With My Life: http://pookon.com/music/dtsa-ep23-gamble.mp3

I spent most of the day hungover laying in bed watching Boy Meets World. Hell of a way to spend a day in Las Vegas. By the time that I could stomach water and food, almost the entire day had passed. Thankfully I was in Las Vegas and there is plenty to do at night, so I took my car down to to the Strip and wandered around for a bit before settling in at the Planet Hollywood to record this episode. Here is a sampling of my Twitter account @pookondotcom from that night when I got into the usual hi-jinks that come from hanging out by yourself and drinking in a foreign city. As you can imagine, things got a little weird. They always do.

Playing Reels O'Dublin at Margaritaville. After all, it is #StPatricksDay. Might as well do something Irish. #LasVegas

The drink girls at Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville wear bikinis. Iceman likes. Mostly because I'm sad, pathetic and single. #LasVegas

I got a Landshark Lager as my "free" beer. I wish I could stay here all day. They have some great music. #Margaritaville #LasVegas

I'm starting to think that I'm unlucky. Oh really Iceman? What tipped you off? When you lost all that money? #LasVegas

It's not even fair how bad I am doing. It's like they should invent a new phrase, like "pulling an Iceman". #loser #LasVegas

My drink girl at Margaritaville had some really nice totties. If I was just a little more drunk, I would've told her. #SexyTime #LasVegas

Roamed the halls of the Flamingo looking for an ice machine. Something tells me I've been here before... #WSoBP #LasVegas

Drinking a potent mixture of rum, whiskey and mountain dew. If this thing kills me, I've led a horrifying life. #rage

Trying to find my favorite slot at Planet Hollywood. Where I can creepily ogle the dancing girls. And I can't find it. #Drunk

Either my bearings are off or they got rid of my favorite machine. I can't find it here. #sadness #LasVegas

I'm seriously upset right now. How am I supposed to creepily ogle the dancing girls now without looking weird? #LasVegas

I feel like another part of me has died. Las Vegas as I know it is no more. I don't ever want to come back here again. #sadness

I'm really upset here. I made one heck of a journey to get here only to find no prize at the finish line. #sadness #LasVegas

I feel like Forrest Gump when he's done running. "I'm pretty tired. I guess I'll go home now." #LasVegas

Don't get me wrong. I love noise. I would eat it for breakfast. But I can't stand noise just for the sake of noise. #LasVegas

Despite all the weird looks I got, I recorded a drunken podcast in #LasVegas. Just as you requested @MPW8279.

#LasVegas doesn't give a fuck that it is a Monday night and neither do I. Hell of a town. #rage

(I'm laughing at some random thing I saw, cackling like a maniac) Random: are you ok man? Me: no way. Not at all. #LasVegas

Drinking wine while watching the Bellagio Fountain show. I have to keep it classy. That's the only way to live. #LasVegas

Sang some Celine Dion at Bellagio with some beautiful girls from New Zealand. It's always good to be the Iceman. #LasVegas

After meeting those girls I definitely want my wife to be from New Zealand. What's sexier than a foreign accent? #LasVegas

Got a Corona and I'm playing Fireball. After this I can definitely call it quits. #LasVegas

Thanks for joining me on yet another adventure. I spend a lot of time alone, which is why I take to my Twitter account to invite the World (well, actually my 270 followers or whomever ends up randomly seeing my tweets because of my hashtags) to come along with me. These things that I put on there are my actual thoughts or things that I did or said. There is no lying or manipulation of the truth. Where's the fun in that? It's hilarious because it's true. I really am this strange. No wonder why I don't have anyone to hang out with on a Saturday night or a girlfriend. Is it that hard to believe? It's a gift and a curse. I can entertain the masses and draw in but at the same time I push everybody away. But that's life. That's what I experience along my drive. Thanks for riding shotgun for a bit. Remember to tip the valet.

 - pookon -

www.pookon.com
https://twitter.com/pookondotcom
https://www.facebook.com/MilwaukeeIceman

The Write Month: June 14 - The Drive to Stay Alive Ep. 19 - Operation Dawn

I've been doing a solo podcast since late October of 2012. I call it The Drive to Stay Alive because I record the episode while I am driving back and forth from work while searching for my purpose in this world; a reason to keep living. I started recording at a very dark time in my life and over the course of the last 8 months I have figured out a lot of things about myself and how to be happy in an otherwise sad world. I haven't got it all figured out yet which is why I keep recording. To my knowledge I'm the only one who has ever listened to an episode of this even though I have posted every single of them in this blog. But I'm ok with that. In fact I don't really care if you listen to them because you don't really have a reason to. It's not your life on the line here. Whatever you tell me to do or try and help me fix my life probably won't work (no offense) because the answer needs to come from within. I have to figure this one out on my own. But I post these episodes to hold myself accountable in the rare case that someone does take the time to know what's going on in my life. At any time someone could stop me and ask if I have stayed true to any of the promises that I have made or if I have quit like I always do. But no one has done that yet. But I do enjoy going back and listening to the previous episodes because each one is a snapshot of my life at that moment. I can also see how much (or how little) I have changed since then. The following episode was recorded at like 3 in the morning when I was in Las Vegas in late March of 2013, which is a bit of a departure from the usual Drive to Stay Alive Podcast. 

I rolled into Las Vegas on a Friday night around midnight. My flights had been delayed and were switched around so I got in later than I had expected. For my troubles I received a $600 travel voucher so my trip started out on a very high note. I arrived at my hotel (The Super 8 just off Strip) and met up with my friends where we hung out and sand some karaoke. They went to bed around 230 am but I was pretty jazzed up and not ready to turn in. That's when I started Operation Dawn. I was drinking (and not driving of course) so I decided to record even though it wasn't a traditional episode of this podcast. It's a little on the long side because I just hit the record button and had a hard time paying attention thanks to the booze, flashing lights and obnoxious noises. But now I'm sober and I was able to edit together a semi-coherent representation of my night. It's not as introspective as I usually get and I in no way, shape or form identify a problem in my life or figure out a way to solve it. But I do have some fun. Some good drunken fun. Give it a listen if you have an hour to burn. 

Right click and Save As to download a copy of The Drive to Stay Alive - Episode 19 - Operation Dawn: http://pookonco.ipower.com/music/dtsa-19.mp3

When I'm drunk and alone I usually take to Twitter to share my adventures with someone. And that someone ends up being anyone who is brave enough to follow me. I'm 100% honest on there and everything that I say actually happened. I know. Seriously. I don't really believe it myself which is why I put it on there. When I sober up I check my Twitter account to see if I imagined it or if it was real. The following are real things that happened to me that night during Operation Dawn:

Picked up my bottle of backpack rum. My weekend in #LasVegas can now officially begin. I'm gonna be drunk 24/7 bitches!

Lost $4, had 2 rum drinks, ate the shit out of some pizza and a $2 local microbrew. This place is awesome. #EllisIslandCasino

My only stipulation for a slot machine is that it has to be as loud and obnoxious and I am. #LasVegas

It's 5am. I won $100 on penny slots and $20 by letting it ride on black. I'm up on the night plus I had plenty of beers. #LasVegas #victory

Fuck. Shit. God damn it. I was up and now I'm back at even. Why did I play blackjack? #GamblingAddiction #LasVegas

I should have left this casino hours ago. I shouldn't have had 10 beers. I've made some mistakes. But fuck it. #rage #LasVegas

I've been in this casino for going on 6 hours now. If I leave even then at least I did something better than sleeping. #rage

I'm just so fucking drunk right now. Creating a spectacle and cheering and laughing over nonsense. Another day in the life... #Iceman

Hanging out with this old dude. I'm drinking beer. He's drinking coffee. This old guy rules! #victory

I don't care if I win money or I lose money. This entire trip is going to be #victory when all is said and done. #LasVegas

The best part about this is that it's 830am back in Wisconsin and I'm talking to @JennyReck and @MPW8279 and I'm wasted. #LasVegas

Every time that I think about leaving this casino I get another round of free games or #victory. I can't lose! #LasVegas

This machine doesn't want me to leave. Every time I get up to go I get another bonus game. And another drink! #victory

This is beyond ridiculous. You would think I was dreaming right now. I have gotten so many free games and so many free beers. #victory

I just left the casino. Didn't sleep all night. Was raging like a banshee. I don't even know what that means. Classic. #victory

Still haven't slept. Drunk as shit, chillaxing in a hot tub. Living the good life. It's good to be the Iceman. #victory

Sobering up by doing laps in the pool. I wish every day could be like this. I truly am living the dream right now. #victory

I know I shouldn't be proud of this, but I'm so fucking drunk still at 9am. My life is insane pal. #LivingTheDream

(Taxi cab rolls up) Driver: you need a taxi? Me: No thanks pal, I'm trying to cut back. #classic

Sitting outside on the street, eating the shit out of some breakfast I got at 7 Eleven. Pretty much a perfect morning. #LasVegas

I'm such a drunken asshole right now. I saw some vomit on the ground, said last night's dinner and chuckled. #classic

I knew #LasVegas had a traffic problem, but I don't remember getting hit by a bus this morning. Good Lord. #GettingOld

This was a really good night. I actually remember a good amount of it despite being so drunk. I love that this happened the first night I was out here because I blew off so much steam and had a blast. I was losing money all night long and then hit a really big score that put me back ahead for the day. And I was drinking. All. Night. Long. When I finally left the casino at like 7am I went swimming to try and sober up. That didn't really work so I went to 7/11 for some breakfast. I sat out on the street corner eating my sausage muffin and drinking some orange juice and I just laughed. It's been a long time since I was that drunk so early in the morning. I just kept laughing to myself that I was a such a drunken asshole. This was a pretty good day. It wasn't the Virgin Islands and I didn't meet a girl. We didn't eat lobster, nor did we drink pina coladas. At sunset we definitely didn't make love like sea otters. I didn't get that day, but this was a day that I wouldn't mind living over and over. How's that for a glass is half full kinda guy?

- pookon - 

www.pookon.com
email: pookondotcom@gmail.com
http://www.facebook.com/MilwaukeeIceman
https://twitter.com/pookondotcom

World Series of Beer Pong VII - Day 3

These fuckers won the World Series of Beer Pong this year and I have no idea who they are. The check says "Seek N Destroy" and I found out on the interwebs that they are from the St. Louis area or some shit, but to be honest with you I couldn't care less about them. Call me bitter or a jerk/asshole/bastard or some variation. I don't care. I never expected to come out here and win $50,000 but at least I used to care about the beer pong community. I used to post in the forums on beerpong.com (formerly bpong.com), interact with fellow beer pong players on Facebook and have a vested interest in the performance of the other players. Sadly a lot of that ended when I stopped playing beer pong on a "professional" level with the cessation of our CHBPL league and when I stopped traveling to Madison, Green Bay and Chicago to play in satellite tournaments. 

And then I stopped giving a shit about beer pong. Once I didn't care about that I started caring about other things like starting the revolution, becoming a rockstar and finding a nice and pretty girl to settle down with. Ok, so I really only concentrated on 2 of those 3 things. Can you guess which ones? My fist is in the air and I'm in 2 bands if you needed a hint. It's not that I'm not a fan of the ladies (because I really am despite what people keep saying) it's just that I'm dog ugly and I'm smooth like a jagged rock when it comes to talking to the ladies. But that's not what we're here to talk about. For the last 5 years (the last time that I made the Day 3 playoffs of the WSoBP was in Year II, which is thankfully captured on film in the Last Cup documentary) I have known or at least expected to miss the playoffs. If I was anywhere else in the world that would have sucked because I wouldn't have known what to do with my day. But the WSoBP is in Las Vegas and if you can't find something to do here then you are in your room closing your eyes shaking naked in the fetal. Wake up, get dressed and go outside. It's Vegas baby!!

The beautiful thing about not having to play beer pong on Day 3 is being able to do whatever the hell I wanted, which also means that I could finally hang out with Kevin. He got here around 11pm on Jan 1st and on the 2nd and 3rd I was busy playing beer pong all day. By the time that I was done around 6pm I was all tuckered out plus I was still sick. As you saw in the videos and read about on this blog, I still managed to make it out of the room and out on the town, but not nearly as much as I could have done without an upset stomach and blisters on my feet. The stomach pains prevented me from drinking and the blisters from walking, so I was pretty useless as far as doing things. Let's just say the fun police would have arrested me and locked me up for life without the possibility of parole. But I didn't have to deal with any of that today because I had no schedule and to do list to pressure me into pushing my body to the limit. I could go at my own pace and take the path of leisure. Which is probably why I did next to nothing on Day 3. All things considered I still managed to do a lot but certainly not as much as in years past.

I had a really hard time remembering what happened on Day 3 because it was the first time that I was able to go nuts and get good and drunk. I carried about some backpack rum and kept on drinking it even when I was getting free drinks in the casinos. Before I knew it it was nearly midnight. What the hell happened to my day? As I was standing outside the Bellagio during the water fountain show I attempted to piece together the events of my day and found out that it took me less than 3 minutes to recap 12 hours. Seeing as how more things had to have happened (it is Las Vegas after all) I deiced to string together all of my pictures from that day and narrate them. The following video is a combination of those two ideas.

I mentioned in the video that I probably tweeted some things that happened during the day that will help me remember Day 3. None of these are very big revelations but they are another piece to the story. That is why I have provided them below. I don't hold anything back from you guys because I want you to know the story of my life. I'm willing to tell it if you are willing to listen to it/read it. My tweets are a little more timely than the videos and pictures, but as you will see nothing really happened until we got to Downtown Las Vegas (which is the 3rd tweet) and that wasn't until night. So that's probably a pretty good reason why I wasn't able to remember the night. Everything that went on occurred during the final few hours which made it all mesh together into one big jumbled memory. I couldn't piece it together in the video and I didn't take any pictures of these events, so some of the information below will be brand new to you. And like always all of it is true. I have no reason to lie or hide anything from you. What do I have to lose anyway? I'm 30, I live with my Mom and I don't have a girlfriend. It's supposed to be all uphill from here, right?

Having a drink to start off the day and recover from the night before. Hell, it's 10am somewhere. #LasVegas
 
Double-Double Burger at In-N-Out with Animal Fries. This must be what heaven feels like. Without the heart attack. #eats
 
On the craps table there's the pass line and the don't pass line, but where is the "you shall not pass!" line? #LordOfTheRings #LasVegas
 
The machine is made by Boyd. Like Boyd Aviation? It's probably the bypass line. It's all ball bearings these days! #GordonLiddy #LasVegas
 
Played Dean Martin's Dance Party and got to hear the "Go Go Go Go!" song. It's been far too long. Life is good. #LasVegas
 
This penguin just got really high and won me 951 credits. I'm not one to judge a lifestyle. I'm for it when I benefit. #LasVegas
 
Saw a game with a black guy and gems called "Midnight Miner." Wow. That's #ALittleRacist, don't you think? #LasVegas
 
This Goldfish game isn't very loud. That's because under the sea, no one can hear you scream. But they can hear you sing. #LittleMermaid
 
My goal tonight is to be asked to leave a casino for being too loud + obnoxious. If I keep drinking + winning, it will happen. #LasVegas
 
Jerry Avila @sxejerry
Goal for tonite in Vegas is to meet bp legend the iceman @pookondotcom
Retweeted by Scott Iceman Reck
 
Ah - Glitter Gulch. Where dreams are born and apparently where strippers go to die. #RIPSapphire
 
I'm at La Bayou looking for Karma to make amends for my wrong doings 2 years ago. If I find her, I will ask her to be my wife. #TooLate
 
The biggest mistake I ever made was leaving Karma. That drink girl was the future Mrs. "Iceman" Reck. I know that now. #regrets
 
Huey Lewis' "Back in Time" from #BackToTheFuture is on. Makes me wish I could go back and propose to Karma. #TooLate
 
I left La Bayou the same way that I walked in - single. Karma is no longer working there. I'll try again next year. #persistence
 
The body is not meant to feel like this. This is inhumane. I hurt so much that future generations of me will hurt. #GettingOld
 
Congratulations to Who Fucking Cares for winning the #WSoBP VII. Sorry. It's not me so I don't give a shit. #bitter
 
Playing quarters into the Bellagio pool during the fountain show. #classic #LasVegas
 
(Man in tux is kissing his wife in wedding dress in front of Bellagio fountains) Me: DO IT DOUG!!! #mallrats
 
Yep. It's now official. My commitment to hating #LasVegas has now begun. Fuck Las Vegas. I hope it burns to the ground. #bitter

I really don't have anything left to say about Day 3. I'm pretty sure that I laid everything out there on black and let it ride. We'll see in a few spins of the wheel how I'm doing or if I have to keep raiding my kid's college funds to recoup my losses and get myself back home. I tend to go balls to the walls on Day 3 because I head back home tomorrow. I literally wore myself out by the end of the day and the only reason I sat down at the Mississippi Stud table game was to sit down and rest. I wish that I would have sat down at a penny slot machine instead because by the time 3am rolled around I had lost $165 dollars. 

While that sucked a lot at the time it's really not that bad considering that I won $250 at American Idol on Day 1 and $250 on 4 Card Poker / Mississippi Stud on Day 2. By those estimates I was actually up like $335 but I didn't factor in all of the other losses I had around time at the slots. I didn't count how much money I went out there with and I didn't count how much I came home with, but from doing that math I can't help but think that all of my expenses (food, gambling and booze) were paid for by my winnings. I might have even come home with some money but I don't really manage my finances very well. That's because I live with my Mom and don't pay rent. Hell I don't even pay for heat, electricity or food. So money doesn't really matter much to me. So if you want some, come on over.

Well, that may be it for the World Series of Beer Pong VII coverage here on Pookon's Ill Blog. It's been like 17 days since I've been home but I've been some kind of sick for every one of them. First it was cold symptoms, then it was congestion in my throat and chest and now I've got some kind of rash on my leg, my ears feel like I'm picking up sound in a church and I'm dizzy. So I'm running the gauntlet of non-normalcy here in 2012 and I still haven't seen a doctor. That's because my health insurance changed for the new year and I had to call some number and authorize something or other. I know that I should have done this already, but instead I just sat at home unable to move most days. I hate to make excuses, but that's one of the reasons why I have been so late to post these Day by Day recaps of the WSoBP. I intend to do one last video / recap of the entire time out there and I wanted to get drunk and sit down with Kevin to do it. But I have been unable to drink until intoxication (which has been terrible but also may be a blessing in disguise) and Kevin went down to Dallas with his brother Gary to help him move there. So we'll probably do that in the next week but if we don't, this will be my last time talking about it until I post all the pictures over at pookon.com.

Although it took a toll on my body in more ways than one, I am glad that I went out to Las Vegas for the 7th consecutive time for the World Series of Beer Pong. Even though Hummel that Shit! only went 4-8 I promised to come back for 3 more years (VIII, IX and X) before calling it quits. But this will be the last time I play with Hummel. Nothing against him as he was undoubtedly the best player on the team, but I promised to play with Kevin one year and Brodey another. Then I decided that I would like to reteam with either Fresno Chris or Joey Kanz one more time to see if we could recapture the magic of Year I (Fresno Chris) or succeed where we have failed many times despite being in my opinion one of the greatest Milwaukee beer pong teams of all time (Joey Kanz). So I still have something to prove out there both to myself and the beer pong community. This chapter might be coming to a close but the story is far from over. So as always keep checking back here on the blog, the Twitter, the Facebook and the website for details. Thanks for following along with me thus far and I hope you were at least entertained. At the end of the day that's all I really hope for because that it was I set out to do. Take care.

- Iceman - 

www.pookon.com

email: pookondotcom@gmail.com

World Series of Beer Pong VII - Day 2

By Day 2 I was feeling better health-wise, but I was still nowhere near 100%. If I had to put it into a math equation that some of you could understand I'd say I was feeling like the square root of 7 divided by 3.41 carry the 2. Since I'm an athlete, not a mathlete I'm not going to attempt to figure that out. If you think you posses more brain than brawn then have at it. And get back to me because I'm curious as to what the answer may be. NOT. Yeah that's right. I went all 90's on your ass. What are you going to do about it? Challenge me to a 1-on-1 game of beer pong? Because you'll beat me. I promise you that. Given the way that I was playing at the World Series anyone could (and did) beat me. But at least things were looking a little rosier on the other side of the bridge on Day 2. But that still isn't saying a lot considering that we finished 1-5 on Day 1 and were losing games by 5-7 cups. Anything would be an improvement over that.

The biggest difference was my health. Physically I was feeling my age and walking around town with little to no padding in my shoes meant some pretty wicked blisters on my feet. And since I sit at a desk all day I don't get around much. I blame myself on that one, but my body isn't used to physical activity. So I felt like shit but at least I wasn't sick. That meant that I could finally drink in the morning and prepare myself properly for a full day's worth of beer pong. I'm one of those people who play better when I'm loose, and to get loose I need rum. And boy did I have some this morning. At first it looked like not even rum could bail me out of poor play. We dropped our first 2 games of the day and our losing streak had hit 7 games. All hell had broken loose and it seemed like we would never win another game. Now I know that I don't practice much back home and that I had low expectations for our WSoBP play, but I didn't expect to do this bad. That's why it was important to win another few games.

I don't remember how it all played out, but we ended up finally winning another game. I went to my record keeper (Facebook and Twitter) and found out that we won the game but our opponents made the rebuttle shot to send it into overtime. We couldn't even get an easy win. So it goes though man and looks like we had to really earn that one. But in the end a win is a win and our record improved to 2-7. Our next game went into overtime as well and I had to hit both kill shots to cement the victory to put us at 3-7. Last year we finished 5-7 and if we won out we could at least match that. But it wasn't meant to be and we dropped the next game to push our record to a disappointing 3-8. It was then that I guaranteed we would win the final game of the year. Using some wisdom from The Godfather I went out there with an attitude of "Just Play" and we won the last game on Day 2 to save a little face and end on a high note. 4-8 was my worst showing at a World Series of Beer Pong but it was to be expected. Sure it hurt at the time but the next day it was a lot easier to swallow.

I had to enlist Hummel to try and help me figure out just what the hell went on during Day 2. Because even though I wasn't that drunk, I was still knocked out from the sickness. I couldn't let that slow me down though because I'm only in Las Vegas once a year and need to live it up for those of you back home who live vicariously through me and follow me on Twitter. Speaking of that social medium, here are my tweets from that day which help to tell the story that my words both written and spoken may have failed to do. I still don't really get the point of Twitter but I suppose for me it is used to remember things and to entertain others. Hopefully you aren't offended easily and have a sense of humor. Because then you should enjoy the nonsense that I'm about to present to you. But don't say I didn't warn you...

@BPONG I want to set up a booth. $5 for photo + autograph from the Iceman. But I don't think I can afford to pay everyone $5. #WSoBP 
 
Hummel that Shit! loses their 6th consecutive game and stands at 1-6. This shit isn't even fun anymore. #WSoBP
 
Iceman is the worst beer pong player of all time and we are now 1-7. Talk about letting people down. #sadness #truth #WSoBP
 
It seems like forever since we won, but that's why it feels so good. Hummel that Shit! is now 2-7 and looking to finish strong. #WSoBP
 
Some random just came up to me and gave me a beer. Free shit. One of the perks of being celebrity. #WSoBP
 
Hummel that Shit took another overtime to win their 3rd game of the #WSoBP. Record now stands at 3-7. Oh well. #RFT
 
(Playing against 2 guys dressed as Santa + the Devil) Guy 1: I'm Santa. Guy 2: I'm Satan. Hummel: I'm Hummel. Me: I'm that shit. #WSoBP
 
Hummel that Shit loses another game and is now 3-8. So much for representing #Milwaukee. Oh well. Next year bitches! #WSoBP
 
Foreign Guy cheering against us: you aren't going to hit this shot! Me: blah blah blah blah, I have a foreign accent! #WSoBP
 
Hummel that Shit! finishes #WSoBP VII with a 4-8 record, which is our worst ever but ok all things considered. #PositiveInEveryScenario
 
I magically found my way back to Planet Hollywood to stare at the dancing girls. It's like I was meant to be here. #creeper
 
Just had an escort try to pick me up. She wanted me for my body, not for my wallet. She found me very attractive. #LiesYouTellYourself
 
I feel bad for her. She was smoking hot. She's probably not used to rejection and I hurt her feelings. #LiesYouTellYourself
 
If the conversation with the escort got into the negotiating phase, it would have been my first serious relationship. #truth
 
If the conversation lasted 10 minutes I would have updated my Facebook relationship status and took her to meet my mother. #truth
 
This gems gems gems game was playing this sweet dance pop "you gotta like it when it's gemmy" song. And I liked it. #LasVegas
 
#LasVegas plays me like a fiddle. The more loud and obnoxious the game, the more money I stick into it. #FIREBALL!!!!
 
Was having a bad day gambling until Uncle Gary showed me some new table games. $250 later and I'm buying everyone steak + eggs. #fantastic

I forgot to mention that my Uncle Gary drove in from Palm Springs on his motorcycle to come watch us play. I've been telling him about the World Series of Beer Pong for many years and he finally came out to check it out for himself. That was really cool of him to come and cheer me on and was just another thing on the long list of cool things my Godfather has done for me. When the "Last Cup" beer pong documentary premiered at the Times Cinema in Wauwatosa my Uncle Gary not only flew here from California but he also rented a limousine for me and some friends so that we could arrive to the movie premiere in style. That was wicked awesome and even though I was pretty drunk it is one of the best times that I ever had. I will never forget about that and if I'm ever in a position to do something cool for him I most certainly will. After we finished playing beer pong we went out on the town to do some gambling. And although I was content on playing the penny slots he wanted to show me how to play this 4 card Poker game and also another one called Mississippi Stud. Using his money ($100) I made a profit of $150 and he let me keep the original $100, meaning that (for you non math wizards out there) that I was up $250 bucks on the night. Seeing as I already won $250 on the American Idol slot machine the other night, things were looking pretty good money-wise.

I wish that I could say the same thing about my health. My blisters on my feet were out of control and I could barely move. I can't remember a time when I was this physically exhausted. My body ached and it was a challenge just to get up out of a chair or walk across the room. You might give me shit for whining like a baby but trust me when I say I couldn't handle doing even the most menial of tasks. I have never felt like that before in my entire life and if I hadn't have been in Las Vegas I would have stayed in bed all day long. It was kind of unfair because the mind was willing but the body wasn't able. I almost hate to say this but now I kind of know what old people and cripples feel like. It was like I was a prisoner in my own body. When we had cleaned out Bally's Casino of all of their chips (we are pretty high rollers after all) we went over to Bill's Gambling Hall and Saloon for steak + eggs at like 330 in the morning. It seemed like a good idea at the time and I think it's a good idea right now. If I was anywhere near Las Vegas I just might head on over there tonight when I'm good and drunk. I don't see that happening, but it doesn't hurt to dream right?

If I had a reason to go to sleep and rest up for the next day I would have done that. But for the 5th consecutive year (Jesus, has it really been that long?) my team has missed the Day 3 playoffs of beer pong. While that does really suck because it means I have no shot at winning the $50,000 grand prize, it does mean that I can whatever I wanted to do with my last day out here in Vegas. And since I have a checklist of things to do every year I'm out here I guess it's a good thing that I have time to do them. First on that list is to go to the In-N-Out Burger, which only exists on the West Coast. It's the one time a year I can get the most delicious burger in the world complete with some Animal Fries. My mouth waters as I think about it right now, but I'll certainly talk more about that when I cover Day 3 in the next post. Hopefully I was able to recap everything that happened today. If I missed something then it will be forever lost because I don't intend to touch base on this again. Well at least until I do the yearly post on pookon.com. But since I don't post that until September or October I usually just make all of that shit up anyway. 

 - Iceman - 

www.pookon.com

email: pookondotcom@gmail.com

World Series of Beer Pong VII - Day 1

I woke up on the morning of January 2nd sick as hell. All that I had to eat yesterday was was a power bar and 1/4 of a Subway footlong sub. Although I wasn't throwing up anymore, things were still coming out of my body wrong. Let's leave it at that. So the last thing that I wanted to do was get out of bed, start drinking and play some beer pong. I was really slow moving this morning and just putting on my socks and shoes took 10 minutes. Normally out here at the World Series of Beer Pong I start drinking around 9am to get ready for the first round of games that begin at 11am. Like most beer pong players, I play better when I've had a few and I'm a little loose. Due to my sickness and exhaustion, I wouldn't have the liquid courage in me to facilitate that loose feeling. I was going to have to go down this path alone. It was really hard at first, but then I got a natural buzz when we won our first game of the tournament. I'm a firm believer in winning the first game because then it's all downhill from there and you can breath a big sigh of relief. Lose the first game and the pressure starts to mount and your back is already up against the wall. We didn't have to worry about that though. With a 1-0 record, Hummel that Shit! was in the driver's seat and cruising towards respectability. 

Oh if it would have only been that easy. I don't know the the hell happened, but somewhere along the way I forgot how to shoot a beer pong ball. You could argue that my lack of practice over the last year directly contributed to my lost shot, but I don't think it's that simple. I do have some video as evidence, but I'm not going to provide that for you at this point. You're just going to go ahead and believe me right now. My shot was so bad that I either hit the table a good 6 inches short of the cups or I airballed it so bad the ball is still traveling. That ball may never land anywhere. I tried to go back to the room to take some shots on my own and I also tried playing against Hummel in the El Dorado practice room. We even played against some other dudes to simulate an actual game but it wasn't enough. I had lost my shot. Hummel was carrying the team but 1 person cannot shoulder all of the weight. It takes 2 people to win a game, which is why it was no surprise to me that we lost the next 5 games that day. Did it suck? Hell yeah it did. It still burns a little bit right now but I'm over it. That's because there's more important things in life than beer pong and in the grand scheme of things none of this matters. God doesn't care about beer pong records. Nor do my real friends. People out here at the World Series might thing I'm a loser because the Iceman has fallen from grace and I'm not the guy from the movie. I am the same guy from the movie, I'm just not a beer pong player anymore. Deal with it pal. By the end of the day Hummel that Shit's record of 1-5 didn't mean a damn thing to me because I had better things to do like hang out with cousin Kevin, who was in Las Vegas for the first time. After going out for a night on the town we stopped to record this video around 330am.

I hope I was able to cover all of the stuff I did on Day 1 of WSoBP VII, but like always this is just a part of the story. This is what I'm able to remember at this point. For a better breakdown of what I was thinking during the day I will provide you with my submissions to Twitter. Don't read them unless you are over 18. Some people just can't handle the Iceman. Don't be one of them.

Getting ready for Day 1 of the #WSoBP. I'm nervous as all hell. Don't know why. I'm not good. Just go have fun pal.
 
Hummel that Shit! gets a 1 cup victory and starts Day 1 with a 1-0 record. #Rage. #WSoBP
 
Iceman forgot to bring the offense and Hummel that Shit! loses game 2 to even their record at 1-1. There is no try. #WSoBP
 
Couldn't hit a 6 stack. Pretty basic shit we missed there. And my looks are becoming a problem. Hummel that Shit! now 1-2. #WSoBP
 
A 7 cup loss puts Hummel that Shit! into the "let's have a good time" club. Oh well. There's always next year. 1-3 record. #WSoBP
 
A lopsided loss puts Hummel that Shit on the outside looking in. A 1-4 record is not ok. Oh well. Time to #RFT. #PositiveInEveryScenario
 
Classic case of "we are who we thought they were" as Hummel that Shit! falls to 1-5. There is no spoon. #disappointed
 
After a successful stint of #NapAndRally, I'm once again gambling away my children's college funds. #LasVegas
 
At Planet Hollywood Casino. If I lean forward and peak between 2 slot machines, I can see sexy ladies dancing. #creeper
 
Just won $50 from the random penguin slot machine. Dolphins may be smug, but penguins kick ass. #animals
 
Some woman sat next to me so I can't creepily oogle the sexy dancers. I'd look at her, but I'm not into mature women. #cougar
 
The cougar has fled the jungle, so now I can once again anonymously oogle the sexy dancers. The way it was meant to be. #creeper
 
These new slot machines have surround sound that vibrate the chairs. My sac tingled a bit. #aLittleGross #LasVegas
 
The lady next to me needs to stop hitting the machine. Don't make them mad. We all know what happens next. #Terminator #TheMatrix
 
I got 2 Bruce Waynes and 3 Batmans but the machine didn't give me money. That's not fair. It's the same person. #SoMuchForAI
 
Batman took $20 from me. Look I know he serves the public by locking up criminals, but do the people have to fund his cause? #bullshit
 
It's been a long day for me and its 345am. I have to go to bed so I can wake up and do it all over again. With better results. #WSoBP
 
Someone left some floor pizza outside of our hotel room. The help will probably think it was us, but I promise it was not. #framed

That's all I know right now. Someday maybe the rest of the details will come back to me. But until that happens you're just going to have to go ahead and take my word for it. You just have to damn it! You weren't there! You're lucky that I'm saying anything at all. What's that bullshit saying? What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas? I could've held true to that archaic and cliched statement and not said a damn thing. But I decided to share it with you. Why? Because sharing is caring. And I care about all of you guys. Because without you I wouldn't have an audience and I would be stuck here by myself talking to myself. If I wanted to do that then it would be just like every other night of my life. I feel the need to switch it up a bit every now and then. You know, to keep it fresh. And fresh is what I do. That's why they call me Iceman. Or some shit like that. I've run out of things to say so I'm just gonna color up my chips and walk away from the table. Stay tuned for Day 2 of the World Series of Beer Pong. Later.

 - Iceman -

www.pookon.com
email: pookondotcom@gmail.com

World Series of Beer Pong VII - Before

When I travel I always like to take one of the earliest flights possible so that I can maximize my time in my destination. This is a fairly common practice among travelers and I know I'm not alone in this belief. Need the proof? The earlier flights are usually the most expensive because all of the seats are occupied. Since I either buy my flight early or get it from my Dad (who uses his frequent flyer miles) I end up rolling into Vegas around noon or 1pm. In comparison Kevin, Chris and Sara bought their flights about 2 weeks prior to this trip and they wouldn't be getting into town until like 11pm or even midnight. This gave me the whole day to wander around by myself getting into trouble before someone was able to knock some sense into me and say that drinking excessively when you are sick is a bad idea. Even though I had a grand old time, I kind of wish that someone would have been there to be the voice of reason. Maybe then I could have spent more time recovering and less time drinking and gambling. Maybe then I would have been better suited to play beer pong on Day 1 of the Tournament. Who knows man. All of this is now in hindsight anyway. At the time it seemed like a good decision. But I stand by it. Because I had one hell of a time.

I bought some rum from the liquor store before heading out and I had more than my fair share of "free" drinks at Bill's Gambling Hall and Saloon before spending a few hours at the Bellagio. While there I played a bunch of fun penny slot machines. Probably the best assortment I have ever seen. First it was a Rock and Roll one that saw my headbanging while giving the "devil's horns" rock sign while the people in the buffet line looked on. Next it was a swashbuckling pirate game. Then a trip down childhood nostalgia with the coolest slot machine ever featuring The Ghostbusters. And finally I played this American Idol game with two foreigners and an older lady. All of us started with $20 and cashed out over $200, which was really nice for everyone. I'm pretty sure of that. Of course there's a lot more to this story which will be told in due time over on Pookon.com, but for now you have the video of me walking out of the Bellagio with my winnings being excited about actually coming in on top for once. 

And just because I love you, here are my tweets from my gambling sessions at Bill's Gambling Hall and the Bellagio. You're welcome. But please use your own discretion and caution while reading. I happen to be a little offensive at time because that's just how I am. I'm not going to apologize but I will throw out this disclaimer because you have the choice to proceed. I will always stand by the fact that no one is exempt and I can't control what I say or do. If it's funny to me I put it out here. Deal with it.

This better be the best god damn 7 and 7 of all time. Fucker cost me $20. It's suckers like me that built this town. #gambling #LasVegas

I'm thoroughly convinced that slot machines are out to get me. The Matrix is real! We are all just batteries!! #LasVegas

I'm playing "The Price is Right'" long enough to get some free drinks but I still think the Price is Wrong Bobby. #HappyGilmoreOnTV

I thought that the drink girl was really keen on me but she only liked me for my money. Which I have no more of. #LasVegas

@backalleyburner I'm playing slots next to Mickey Rourke. He was Pakastani in that film. What happened to Jeff Bridges? #IronMan

I just gave $1 to a bum because he had a sign that said "Why Lie? I need beer." A man after my own heart. Hell of a town. #LasVegas

I love walking through the Bellagio with track pants and a Brewers jersey. It's my way of saying "fuck you high society" #LasVegas

I love being a spectacle. People are staring. I'm playing this Rock N' Roll slot machine, throwing up the devil's horns + shouting. #RFT

Now the machine might say otherwise, but I'm a winner because I brought joy to the 10 people surrounding me as I rocked. #LasVegas

I won $30 on a pirate slot and I jumped around slapping my ass and shouting yo-ho! Creating a spectacle. #classic

You would think I was winning hundreds by how excited I get. Nope. Just a few bucks. But I have more fun than anyone. #LasVegas

I fully intended to walk out of the Bellagio even, but then I saw a #Ghostbusters slot machine. I ain't afraid of losing no money!!

When you're losing money, on the slot machine - who ya gonna call? My boss to get an advance on my paycheck. #Ghostbusters #LasVegas

On the #Ghostbusters slot machine you can make the terror dogs go away by touching them. In my dreams I had to wake up. #LasVegas

Here's a nickel's worth of free advice - never play a slot machine of something you hold dear. They beat you on nostalgia. #LasVegas

Are you fucking kidding me?!? I just won $150 doll hairs on the #AmericanIdol slot machine by getting a shit load of Ellens!!!!

I don't care what the critics say. American Idol is the shit. This slot machine has made me $160 doll hairs so far. #LasVegas

Playing American Idol slot machine with a bunch of Japs. What do they know about America? #LasVegas

I may never leave this #AmericanIdol slot machine. After going up big I'm now breaking even. = free drinks for Scotty. #LasVegas

So the drink girl keeps coming by. But I wish that a sandwich girl came by because I'm hungry as shit. #LasVegas

I may never leave this slot machine. I'm cleaning up like a Spanish housekeeper. I started with $20 now I'm at $250. #LasVegas

When you are up over $200 it doesn't seem real. It's like playing with house money. I'm betting $6 a spin. #LasVegas

You might as well forward my mail here. Because I'm never leaving this #AmericanIdol slot machine. #LasVegas

The hardest part is knowing when to walk away. Kenny Rodgers said it best - you got to know when to fold 'em. #LasVegas

I'm up well over $300 now and at some point I need to stop. This is a lot of money. This will buy me nice things. #LasVegas

After well over 2 hours I decided to stop up $250. I could've made more money but greed got the best of me. But still - $250. #LasVegas

#LasVegas. Hell of a town. Won $250. Got my picture taken with Barney and Iron Man. Drinking in the streets. #Rage

This is just a part of the story but it gives you a pretty good glimpse into my life and what it is like to be in Las Vegas with me. As always I thank you for taking the time to try and figure just what the hell is wrong with me, and if you have any suggestions you know how to reach me. Thanks for the support because I couldn't do this shit without you. I'll go forever without posting anything on here, but when I hear that someone actually reads this drivel it makes it all worth it. And sends me right back to the keyboard to produce more content. Even though in reality I do this for me as a way to look back on the story of my life (I have a terrible memory) it sure is nice to have a little validation that I'm not wasting my time. Because there are plenty of things that I probably should be doing instead of sitting in my Mom's basement hammering out this adventure. But I guess I wouldn't have it any way. Which is why I do it. I'm gonna leave you now but trust in the fact this is only scratching the surface of World Series of Beer Pong VII. There are still plenty of tales to share. Make sure you bring your ass back here.

 - Iceman -

www.pookon.com
email: pookondotcom@gmail.com

World Series of Beer Pong VII - That's All for Now

Hey everyone. I'm posting on here just to basically let you know that there won't be any more updates on here until I get back home. At this point I've given up searching for free WiFi because I have giant blisters on me feet and a full schedule of walking ahead of me today, so walking will only be done for essentials. And sadly posting videos and commentary on here (not to mention all the back end stuff like formating, styling and uploading that goes on in creating content) would take up a lot of my day. I know in years past I was able to do it, but back then I wasn't old. Deal with it.

So instead of bringing you more content on here I'm going to go out into the world, fetch me a rum and create some new content for future posting. Since I will be back home in Milwaukee tomorrow night, I can start posting the things that I was planning to show you out here, so stay tuned for that stuff over the weekend. Back home it will be so much easier to do, plus it will give me something to do while I am recovering from the week long sickness that inevitably follows each World Series.

Today is hopefully going to be filled with some good times and happy memories. I know for sure we're going to In-N-Out Burger, the Main Street Station Brewery, downtown Las Vegas and out looking for Karma. If I find her, I'm going to ask her to be my wife. I should have never left her, and I have spent the last few years of my life paying dearly for it. So if I come home with a darling cocktail waitress on my arm, I gotta inform my roommate that there's going to be another person living in the house. So she knows to buy more groceries and toiletries. One can dream. Oh Karma. I dream of you every night. How could I have been so careless??

While I'm out chasing Karma, Kevin will be out chasing Destiny and Brodey still has time to hop on a plane to come out here to see if Sapphire is still alive. You never know man. Strippers are some tough critters with an outstanding willingness to survive against all odds while being a single mother and putting theirselves through college. I for one will stand and applaud their efforts. And go and get change for a $10. They need your help. Feeding the poor and helping out the meek and lowly is what Jesus would have done. I'm just trying to walk in his footsteps. You can't fault a guy for trying to do a good dead.

So while there probably won't be anything here, that doesn't mean there won't be anything of substance on Facebook or Twitter, so check there early and often. You'll either roll with laughter or be disgusted. But either way I will touch you. Even if you don't like it. But you know you do, so let's keep this quiet and don't tell the proper authorities, ok?

- Iceman -

World Series of Beer Pong VII - It's All Over

Day 2 might have been better than Day 1, but that's not saying a lot since we only had 1 win on the first day. But I decided to triple my winnings. It is Las Vegas after all and out here they let you do that crazy shit. We ended up going 3-3 today which is good for a normal day, but combined with our first day record (for you smart people out there) only equates to 4 wins. Last time I checked that's not good enough. But oh well man. So it goes.

I'm still trying (albeit not very hard - I haven't even left the hotel room) to find some free WiFi because lord knows I'm not paying for that shit. I might pay for all of this excessive drinking with years off of my life, but heaven forbid I scrape off a couple of bucks to provide you with some exclusive content. You know that I love you too much to do something silly like that. But someday you will get to see all this nonsense. Even if I have to walk back home to personally show it to you myself.

The day is over as far as beer pong goes, but there are still plenty of hours left here in Las Vegas before we are forced to go back home and annoy our families. So keep on checking back on my social networking sites to see what kind of shenanigans that cousin Kevin and I get into. Some might not be fit to print, but that is where your rabid imagination comes into play. If you can dream it, we can do it. So aim high! Reach for the stars! And let your conscience be your guide! Jiminy Cricket that shit!

That's all I've got for right now because this is becoming increasingly difficult with every sip I take. Well then stop drinking Iceman you say. You sound like my mother. But that's not necessarily a bad thing. Time to detox when I get home. But now is not that time! Here is not that place! And if.we win today the 4th of July will no longer be known as an American holiday but as a day when the world declared in one voice - we will not go down without a fight! We will not vanish into the night! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our INDEPENDANCE DAY!!!!

- Iceman -

World Series of Beer Pong VII - update

Sorry folks, still searching for a free WiFi connection. There aren't any at the Flamingo like last year. I might have to venture out to a Starbucks or some shit just to be able to post some videos as well as an update. But the results are in and they're not good. We are losing more games than winning and stand at 2-7 with 3 more games to play today. So things could be better but I'm drunk in Las Vegas. What more could you ask for?

I hope I can post a real update with all the bells and whistles (as old people like me say) but I doubt I'll be able to any day soon. Cousin Kevin is itching to hang out with me after spending the day wandering alone and my Uncle Gary is driving in from California to come hang out for the night, so if anything I won't get things posted until tomorrow morning at the earliest. Sorry folks, but I have to play the hand that I'm am dealt, to use a little Vegas phrase.

I hope everyone is doing well and that your New Year has started off right. Thanks again for all the love and support and make sure you check out the Facebook and the Twitter for all of the up to the minute results from the WSoBP. They won't always be good, but I do promise that I will always have something to say and that I will do my best to entertain. Take care.

- Iceman -