Keep me away from the ledge...

...cause I just may jump off. I told my roommates Paul and Joe that I am no longer allowed to go out back on our rooftop patio because I may get the urge to hurl myself off of it because the Milwaukee Brewers are playing so poorly right now. Granted, it is only on the 2nd floor and I might only sustain minor injuries (broken bones and such) unless I landed on my head. This thought got me thinking about something. Is it OK to joke about suicide? I've been depressed at several stages in my life, but I never once thought about ending my life. That's why I always turn to alcohol to solve my problems. That leads to another point then I guess - is it OK to joke about alcoholism too? I really shouldn't poke fun or use them to elicit humor from others, but I guess I just don't have any tact when it comes to conversation topics. It's one of the reasons why I sit alone in my room, drink, and don't talk to anyone besides my cat. On a more serious note, I am 100 % totally against suicide because it is one of the most selfish thing that someone could do. Sure, their problems may be over, but everyone that they left behind will be forced to think about it and deal with it for the rest of their lives. If it is someone who is very close to you, then not a day would go by where you wouldn't think about them and how much you wish that they were still alive. It's complete bullshit that someone would ever think that it was OK to screw over everyone they ever met by doing something so hurtful and uncalled for. But then I guess it begs the question to be asked - am I hurting other people by making jokes about the suggestion of it? At which point does fantasy become a reality? I always tell people that I am all talk and no game, which is a direct result in me never being serious about anything. I can't count how many times that I have broken into laughter when my Mom was yelling at me about something that was not funny, or how many times that I have had to choke back tears at church because I was trying to suppress my laughter. I don't take anything seriously, and it has resulted in me having a worthless life. I told my roommate Paul that the Brewers 2008 September collapse was the worst thing that has happened to me since my parents got divorced and my life got F-d up. He of course was taken aback by it and a little floored by my comparison of a sports team's follies with a major life event, but I kind of meant it. Sure, I was a little drunk at the time, but that's usually when I am the most open on honest. He said that I never set myself up for failure, which is why I am never disappointed. He's got a really good point, as I really never try to better myself in any of life's most important facets. Which is why I guess the Brewers September struggles are hitting me so hard. I've invested a lifetime's worth of Brewers baseball into the last 7 years when I've obsessed over every aspect of the team. I finally gave in to all the hype and believed that this was the year, and although I've been through the ups and downs over the years, there has never been a year quite like this. We opened the month with a 5 1/2 game lead, and as of today, that lead is down to 0 as we share the NL Wildcard 1st place with the Philadelphia Phillies. Sure, by winning 4 games against us they caught up real quick, but there was no reason why it should have ever happened. Without getting into too many details (my Journalism professors always told me to be short and sweet, looks like I didn't listen. No wonder I failed their classes) the Brewers had a spot in the 2008 postseason and it was theirs to lose. And they are not only losing it, but they are giving it away for free. Since my attitude is connected directly to the outcome of every Brewers game, it goes without saying that I should be placed on watch right now so that I don't do anything stupid. Like stumbling out onto the porch and falling over the ledge. Tony would be pissed.

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There's still a chance (be it remote) for the Brewers to turn it around and right the ship so that the passengers (thailers!) won't drown in the stormy sea, but it's looking a little gloomier with every passing day. If alcohol isn't the answer, then what is? I'll tell you what is - victory. Because if the Brewers win, then it doesn't matter what the other teams do. And if they win, then I win. I'm sick and tired of being a loser, and for once I would just like to be a winner like everyone else that I know. Then my family can finally stop referring to me as their loser brother/son/cousin/nephew/grandson. Cause I know that they are all sick and tired of me being the black sheep in the family. I guess we'll know in a few more days whether or not it's going to be another long and bleak "well, there's always next year" winter that we in Milwaukee have grown all too accustomed to. At least we have A-Rodge (Aaron Rodgers) to help ease the pain.

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- pookon -

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email: pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers vs Padres 9/04 - 9/07 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 46 - Milwaukee Brewers vs San Diego Padres September 4 - September 7 at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

I know that there are a few games left to go in the 2008 season, but I have no doubt that the Brewers vs Padres series (this one) will go down as one of the most disappointing series of the year. If we happen to miss the playoffs (I surely hope that I'm not jinxing it by mentioning it right now) it will be a direct result of this homestand including this series. Sure, they still have 4 games against the Philadelphia Phillies (who trail Milwaukee in the Wildcard) and 6 games against the Chicago Cubs (who lead the NL Central) so they can chose their destiny by beating those teams. But to get to those games, they need to beat the teams that are worse than them, teams like San Diego and Cincinnati. San Diego is one of the worst teams in the National League, but the Brewers certainly beat up on them like they should have. What follows is one of the most ridiculous performances that I have ever seen by a Brewers team, and I used to watch games at Milwaukee County Stadium and the early days of Miller Oark when players like Lyle Mouton, James Mouton and Marc Newfield were roaming the outfield, Mike Matheny was catching, John Jaha was playing 1st, Eric Young at 2nd, Kevin Seitzer at 3rd, Jose Hernandez at SS, and pitchers Scott Karl, Cal Eldred, Glendon Rusch, Jeff D'Amico, Mike Fetters, Valerio de los Santos, Curtis Leskanic, and Nick Neugebauer were on the hill. That's some crazy ass name dropping. So believe me when I say that I have seen some poor Brewers teams over the years. This 2008 team is totally better than all of the previous teams (with the exception of the early 80's and early 90's) yet they aren't currently playing like it. It's almost like they don't want the playoffs, even though it has been gift-wrapped and handed to them on a silver platter. I have to post a warning here, the content that follows is extremely negative because I'm really pissed off that the Brewers are blowing it in September and I may once again have to settle with a normal baseball season that doesn't include scheduled games in October. Oh the humanity. Well, on with the negative and upsetting wrap-up.

Game 1 (Thursday) - Jeff Suppan (10-8, 4.56 ERA) vs Shawn Estes (2-1, 2.97 ERA)

Suppan was his old self again, and not the magical pitcher that he was in August (when he compiled a 5-0 record with a 3.00ish ERA for the month). The nice thing about Suppan's old self is that he's going to pitch 6 innings and give up 4 runs. He's never going to shut down a team, so it is up to the offense to back him up. All Soup can do is limit the offense from the opposing team and the Brewers bats need to step it up just a little bit more. But Soup was a little worse than normal, as he went 5 1/3 innings and gave up 5 runs. It might as well have been 50 runs with the way that the Brewers offense has been playing lately. There was no way that they would have been able to plate 6 runs against some kid named Shawn Estes and the worst team in the National League. To think that they would be able to do that is just silliness. I hate to sound pessimistic and upset, but G D it, I F-ing am! I'm tired of this September losing BS. If Soup couldn't rescue he team (and despite his magical August, no one figured that he would), then who can? The Brewers scored a couple of garbage runs, but this game was already over from the time that the anemic offense came to the plate in the bottom of the 1st inning. We need more than a band-aid to stop this bleeding, and if doesn't happen soon, we can kiss the playoffs goodbye. Thank heavens that CC Sabathia is pitching tomorrow against some guy that I don't know, or else I'd have a panic attack. If you look up the word Savior in the dictionary, you'd see a picture of Jesus Christ and CC Sabathia eating a picnic lunch on a blanket in the park. They'd be laughing, sharing a bottle of wine, eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, laughing and recalling memories from the good old days, and enjoying each other's company. Now that's a party that I'd like to be invited to. Final score Padres 5, Brewers 2.

Brewers record : 80 - 60, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Friday) - CC Sabathia (15-8, 2.77 ERA) vs Josh Geer (1-0, 3.60 ERA)

The Brewers offense was damn near horrid again, but that was ok because CC is basically flawless. Richard Kessler (who wants to be your jeweler) was jealous, because CC has more flawless facets than even his most pure 81-faceted Kessler 81 diamond. If you want a diamond that burns with all the fire and brilliance Mother Nature intended, the Kessler 81 is the diamond for you. But if you want a pitcher that burns with all the fire and brilliance that Major League Baseball intended, then CC Sabathia is the pitcher for you. Take that Kessler. The Brewers were barely clinging to a 2-1 lead in the 8th inning (CC only made it through 7 innings and topped out at 106 pitches today) thanks to the horrendous offense, but then CC was denied his 10th victory with the Brewers from the moment that Eric Gagne toed the rubber. When he came into the game, fans started the preemptive booing because they knew exactly what was coming next - Gagne was about to blow the game. You don't need ESP to see that shit coming. Gagne allowed a homerun that tied the game at 2, and since the Brewers offense is horrible at the moment, it took us until the bottom of the 11th inning to scratch across the winning run. Rivera led off with a single, then Counsell tried to bunt Escobar (in for Rivera as a pinch runner) over, but hit into a fielder's choice at 2nd. Durham followed with a single that moved Counsell to 3rd, then JJ Hardy (who was 0-5 today) hit a single to left and all of Brewers nation exhaled. Then they shouted really freaking loud. Sure, it was just a win over the Padres, but when you are 0-for-September and in a 4 game losing streak, it's exhilarating to end it with a win. I almost lost it, but thankfully the Brewers saved me from ending up in the hospital with a heart attack. If you can't win against the worst team with MF-ing CC Sabathia on the mound, then you don't deserve to represent your league in October. There's still hope for us, but it's time to get our asses in gear. Final score Brewers 3, Padres 2.

Brewers record : 81 - 60, 2nd place NL Central (4 games back of Chicago), 1st place NL Wild Card (4 games ahead of Philadelphia)

Game 3 (Saturday) - Ben Sheets (13-7, 2.82 ERA) vs Jake Peavy (9-10, 2.63 ERA)

Jake Peavy is the reigning NL Cy Young award winner (given out to the best pitcher in each league) and Ben Sheets is having a career year in his last as a Brewer (setting a career high in wins at a paltry 13). So I knew going into this game that we were going to see an old fashioned pitcher's duel that the bandwagon fans would hate because of the lack of offense. They have no respect for the game, and make t-shirts like "Bernie digs the long ball" because they get all excited when Bernie goes down the slide. I guess homeruns are nice because they can change the game, but I'm getting tired of this "if we can't score homeruns via the homerun, then we just aren't going to score runs at all" bullshit mentality that the Brewers employ in their offensive scheme. I for one, enjoyed every second of this game. How could you not love a Sheets/Peavy matchup? Are you high or something? All of the offense came in the 3rd inning, when Braun hit a tapper towards 3rd, which Peavy fielded and threw low to first, allowing Braun to reach on an infield single. It could have easily been ruled an error. Fielder then ripped a scorching liner over the head of Giles in right field, which allowed Braun to score from 1st. And that's all the Murder, She (Angela Lansbury) Wrote. There really wasn't much else here, as Sheets eases everyone's injury concerns by throwing a 120 pitch complete game shutout. Looks like our pitchers need to be damn near perfect because our offense forgot that you need to have runners cross the plate in order for there to be numbers under the letter R on the scoreboard. Today Sheets was, but it's impossible to ask all of our pitchers to pitch like this every time out. We're in big trouble if we can't get some runs. So like an awkward teenager in high school , we are going to have to figure out how to score so we don't get laughed at in college for being a virgin. Final score Brewers 1, Padres 0.

Brewers record : 82 - 60, 2nd place NL Central (4 games back of Chicago), 1st place NL Wild Card (4 1/2 games ahead of Philadelphia)

Game 4 (Sunday) - Manny Parra (10-7, ERA) vs Chris Young (5-5, 4.48 ERA)

I was working this game, but I almost wish that I wasn't. It was Corey Hart bobblehead day, so naturally the game was sold out. For the first time since I began buying tickets for the bobblehead games to get my bobbleheads (instead of purchasing them off of EBay) I got one of the 5,000 limited edition retro bobbleheads. Most people would be stoked about that, but I was pissed because I don't want the players in the retro uniforms because that's not what they wear. The bandwagon fans dig the old ball and glove logo, and although I will admit that it is the most clever logo in the history of sports, it doesn't belong on the uniforms of current players. Fan demand brought it back, but it seems to me like they always lose when they wear those unis. Thankfully some guys sitting by my friends Casey, Lorge, Denise and Amanda didn't want theirs, so I was able to get a normal one of Corey in the home white uniform to keep the consistency in my collection. I wanted to go home, but I was getting paid, so I decided to stick around. Oh yeah, and because I'm a true fan of the game of baseball, I wanted to see if Chris Young could complete his bid for a perfect game. He had not allowed a runner to reach 1st base via a hit, walk, or error going into the 8th inning, then it all changed when Gabe Kapler (with 2 outs no less) hit a homerun to left to put the Brewers on the board and break up the perfect game. Everyone stood and cheered and clapped their hands, but the true baseball fans in attendance were clapping for Chris Young and not Gabe Kapler. It's not every day that you get to see a no hitter or perfect game, but I was glad that Kapler broke it up. I watched on TV on June 12, 2007 when Justin Verlander of the Detroit Tigers threw a no-hitter against the Brewers. That was tough to watch. Interesting tid-bit, I was planning on going to Detroit with Kanz for this series, and I was just about to make hotel reservations when Kanz found out he couldn't get off of work. So I would have been able to see it in person, which would have been cool from a baseball standpoint, but not from a Brewers standpoint. No one wants to see their team get no hit. So we now know how Chris Young did during the game, so how did Manny Parra do? 5 innings, 6 runs allowed (but only 1 earned thanks to Bill Hall's costly error) and the Brewers lost this one easily. The only other redeeming part of this game was Matt Gamel's 1st Major League hit (a double) in the bottom of the 9th inning. Hopefully that is the 1st of many to come when he makes it to the big leagues. Where he will end up playing will be the subject of many drunken debates between my friends and I. That much I am sure of. You know what else I am sure of? The Brewers sucked today. Real bad. There's always tomorrow, but I don't think I'll like tomorrow cause we head off to the City of Brotherly Love (yeah right) to face the Philadelphia Phillies. Good luck Crew. Final score Padres 10, Brewers 1.

Brewers record : 82 - 61, 2nd place NL Central (4 games back of Chicago), 1st place NL Wild Card (4 games ahead of Philadelphia)

So there we go. We scored a total of 7 runs in 4 games (spanning 38 innings). That's an average of 1.75 Runs per game. Luckily we were playing against one of the worst teams in the NL and 2 of our pitchers (CC, Sheets) were flawless in the games that we were able to win. It's not as bad as it could have been (we could have lost the series of got swept by the Padres) but it was pretty damn close. This late in the season, you have to take advantage of the games that you are supposed to win (at home no less) against inferior opponents. Not taking advantage of it is like letting that golden opportunity slip away. Since we currently have the lead in the NL Wildcard, all we have to do is split the remainder of our games (play .500 baseball the rest of the year) and we should make the playoffs, right? Sounds easy enough. But it's not. If it were easy we would already have been in the playoffs during the years 1983-2007 and wouldn't keep talking about the playoff drought that has been going on for 26 years. If they keep this shitty play going on, it is soon to be 27 years. I don't want to see that happen, so they better get their asses in gear and win a couple of games against Cincinnati. If they don't, you'll bet that I'll be on here bitching about it. See you then with hopefully some good news, but from the way that it has been going lately, it's hard to believe that anything good can happen to this team. It's like God hates us or something. God, if you're listening - just what the heck did we do to piss you off?

Next up - September 8 (Monday) - September 10 (Wednesday) Milwaukee Brewers vs Cincinatti Reds at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

- pookon -

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email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers vs Mets 9/01 - 9/03 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 45 - Milwaukee Brewers vs New York Mets September 1 - September 3 at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

The New York Mets are currently in 1st place in the NL East, but since the Philadelphia Philles are nipping at their heals, that puts both of these teams somewhat in 2nd place for the NL Wildcard. Whichever team is not in the lead of the division is a danger to us in our pursuit of the playoffs, so every game against either team is huge because we need to beat them, gain a win, and hand them a loss. It goes without saying (but never does because I keep saying it) that every single game is September is huge, but this series was bigger, because if the season were to end today, we would be playing the New York Mets in the 1st round of the playoffs. The Cubs would play the Diamondbacks because the Diamondbacks have the worst record out of all the teams in the playoffs. Normally the team with the best record (the Cubs) would play the Wild Card winner, but some rule stipulates that you cannot play a division opponent in the 1st round, so that is why the playoff structure shakes out like it does. If we end up making the playoffs as the Wild Card winner (because we still have a chance to win the division with 6 games remaining against the Cubs), we will play the Mets or the Philles, so this series is a pretty good preview of things to come. We will also play the Phillies from September 11 - 14, so then we'll see how we stack up against that team. Since this Mets series is done and gone, I can say that we better figure out how to play ball with the big boys before we meet them in October. The Mets didn't really manhandle us, they just straight up outplayed us, and showed the Brewers that they were a better, more complete team. While I think that it is an accomplishment and a step in the right direction to just make the playoffs after a 26 year drought, losing in the playoffs is going to be devastating because after this year we lose CC Sabathia and Ben Sheets. And then suddenly the pitching staff that has been carrying us during the 2nd half of 2008 now has a ton of question marks. But enough worrying about that; we'll figure that all out in the offseason. For now, we need to learn how to beat teams that are just as good as we are if not better than we are. Beating team like the Mets, Cubs and Phillies has just become our #1 priority for the 2008 season, because those are the teams standing between us and that magical month called October. And if this series is any indication, they have to learn to do it quick, or else it will be the October that they have been quite accustomed to - the one where they get to watch playoff baseball from their couches in the comfort of their own living rooms. Let's hope they get to watch it from the cold hard pine of the dugout bench. But until then, on with the wrap-up.

Game 1 (Monday) - Ben Sheets (12-7, 2.97 ERA) vs Johan Santana (12-7, 2.71 ERA)

I was super excited to go to work today on Labor Day. Most people would be pissed that they had to work when everyone else has the day off, but since I was getting holiday pay from my real job, I didn't mind working at Miller Park and getting holiday pay there as well. That means I would be getting paid like a prostitute today, except that the money was all mine and I didn't have to pay my pimp. What a sweet deal! Even if I wasn't working, I would have found a way to get into sold-out Miller Park for this marquee matchup of Sheets vs Santana. I am never worried about us going against Santana, since we have seen him many times over the years when he was with the Twins. Don't get me wrong, he is one of the premiere pitchers in the league, but it is my opinion that we always play pretty well against him. I'd look up Santana's career stats against the Brewers, but you all know that I'm too lazy for that shit. So I didn't worry about that. So my profound thanks goes out to Ben Sheets for giving me something to worry about. Sheets left the game in the 5th inning with tightness in his groin (how many times have I told you to stop pulling your groin Benny, you'll go blind that way!) and although it was seen as a precautionary measure, everyone in Milwaukee knows this one all too well. We were just waiting for the other show to drop and see Ben Sheets' name on the disabled list, which would almost kiss our season goodbye. But he made his next start against the Padres, so I now know that everything is ok. But back to this game. The Brewers had a 2-0 lead going into the 7th inning, but Shouse allowed a run, but still left the Brewers with a 1 run lead. Then Automatic Gagne came in in the 8th inning and allowed 3 runs (2 of them on a homerun to Delgado) to put the Mets up 4-2 and crush Ben Sheets' hope at winning a career high 13th game. I call Gagne Automatic (a term which is usually reserved for someone who is close to 100% perfect) because I can use it ironically because it's almost a given that Gagne will blow it or give up a few runs. He's this year's Derrick Turnbow even after this year's real Derrick Turnbow was sent down to the minors back in April. It's no wonder that that capacity crowd of 41, 476 joined in a chorus of boooooos and rained them down on the worthless Canadian. If I wasn't in the kitchen counting out my money and getting free eats, I would have joined them. I normally don't like to boo my own players, but Eric Gagne sucks. He really sucks. He sucks more than, uh... (I guess since I'm being unrated because no one reads this blog) a prostitute. Whore. Slut for money. It was awful. So the Mets take game 1, Sheets leaves with an injury, and Chicken Little says that the sky is falling. Right now I'm almost willing to believe him, but I still won't take the kid who cries Wolf seriously. Go figure. Final score Mets 4, Brewers 2.

Brewers record : 80 - 57, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Tuesday) - Manny Parra (10-6, 4.10 ERA) vs Jonathon Niese (0-0, 15.00 ERA)

Manny Parra had a tall order today - succeed where others before you had failed. He had to go deep into the game, since obviously our bullpen can't be trusted with a lead. Sheets left after the 5th inning, and that really didn't work out too well for us. Like he has too many times of late, Manny wasn't up for the challenge. He only went 5 innings and gave up 5 earned runs, but when he left the game, the scored was tied at 5. So I guess you really can't blame him for the loss today, because the Brewers had every chance to win this one. After the Brewers rallied for a 4 run 5th inning to tie the game, they pretty much shut it down. They brought in Torres with a tie game in the 9th, and he kept it tied, but the offense failed to walk this one off. And then Ned ran Torres out there for the 10th, and although I know that he's a durable multi-inning pitcher, I think that it is a mistake to allow your closer to pitch 2 innings. Wanna know why? Because this shit happens. Torres allows men to reach base and there are runners at the corners with no outs. A sac fly scores the runner, and the Mets take the lead. The Brewers then fail to score and the game is over. I know that there aren't really any other options in the bullpen as far as reliable pitchers, but Torres can't throw every inning of relief and still be counted on as the closer. He should not have been pitching the 10th inning today, and it cost the Brewers the game. I hate to point fingers, especially since he has been so good (6-4 record, 2.47 ERA, 26 saves) but Torres should only pitch multiple innings when he has to come in for the 8th, then he should stick around for the 9th. I hate to bash Ned Yost because it is as trendy as Crocs, but maybe it's time to get a manager who can recognize trends and mistakes, then learn from them. I wouldn't mind giving an established managers with post-season experience a chance to skipper this team, because it seems like Yost's Brewers always have a 2nd half fall-off. More on that later, I'm sure. Final score Mets 6, Brewers 5.

Brewers record : 80 - 58, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 3 (Wednesday) - Dave Bush (9-10, 4.33 ERA) vs Oliver Perez (10-7, 3.86 ERA)

So if you think Manny Parra was given a tall order, then what the hell was Dave Bush given? He was asked to prevent a 3-game sweep at home against the Mets. And how did he respond? Poorly. Very poorly. The Mets scored 6 runs in the 1st inning, and this game was over before the majority of fans even took their seats. It's too bad they weren't carrying radios, because if that were me, I would've heard the score, then turned around and headed back to the parking lot. I call myself a pretty big Brewers fan, but even the diehards know when to admit defeat. I'd still listen to the game on my radio in the Miller Park parking lot, but the beer and food would be a hell of a lot cheaper and it would cost less money to get drunk enough to forget about this abismal series. I don't really even want to talk about this game anymore, but you knew that this game was officially over in the top of the 9th inning when Brad Nelson was playing 1st base, Alcides Escobar was playing shortstop, and Matt Gamel was playing 3rd base. And Mike Rivera, who previously was playing 1st base, replaced Kendall as the catcher. And at that moment we looked like the Brewers that I knew all too well over the course of the years - playing the September call-up players in preparation for next year because you've already given up on this year. It sucks that it happened, but at least Escobar got his 1st major league hit. Despite the team loss, that's got to be a good individual feeling. I wouldn't know... Final score Mets 9, Brewers 2.

Brewers record : 80 - 59, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

So that was rough. Rough like sandpaper. Rough like sandpaper when it is the only kind of paper that you have been given to wipe your ass with after taking a poop. Sorry for the graphic image, but I just had to demonstrate how rough it really was. So not only did we fail against the Cubs at Miller Park back in July, but we now failed against another playoff contender in the Mets. These Brewers are not instilling me with a lot of confidence, and I'm trying so hard not to push the panic button. My fingers are dangling nervously above it, but until we are mathematically eliminated from the playoffs, I refuse to panic. But that doesn't mean that I'm not really uneasy during every game, sitting on the edge of my seat, biting my finger nails and looking for a drop or swig of alcohol to ease my pain. I wish that Kazaam would pop out of his magic jukebox so that I could wish that Shaq never made that movie, and then I would use my 2nd wish to get the Brewers to the World Series in whichever way possible. Then I would use my 3rd wish for an unlimited supply of money, because if you've got money, you can do just about everything. Even SuperModels. But it would all be a moot point since when I used my 1st wish to wish Shaq never made Kazaam, Kazaam would disappear and void my remaining wishes, so the Brewers won't make the playoffs and I won't have dollars to trick SuperModels into going out with me. But I would be given the key to every city on Earth, because I would have rid the World of Shaq's abomination of a movie. And with notoriety comes money and chicks. The only thing missing would be the Brewers in the World Series. But if I had money, I could build a super team. So maybe there is a way that I can make everything work. I'll have to figure that out. The only thing that I know is that Shaquille O'Neal and Kazzam have something to do with it. That is the first piece of the puzzle. What happens from here on out is the mystery...

Next up - September 4 (Thursday) - September 7 (Sunday) Milwaukee Brewers vs San Diego Padres at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

- pookon -

http://www.pookon.com/
email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers @ Pirates 8/29 - 8/31 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 44 - Milwaukee Brewers @ Pittsburgh Pirates August 29 - August 31 at PNC Park in Pittsburgh, PA

PNC Park has always been a house of horrors for the Brewers, but now they love it just as much as visiting fans do. It's because the Pirates are really that bad. You hate to guarantee anything, but now it seems like a game against the Pirates is a guaranteed win. We are better than them in every single way, except for the logo of course. Sorry, but a cursive script and a stick of barley ain't got shit on a growling pirate. I can probably say that I like beer more than I like pirates, because beer is more real to me, but we aren't the Milwaukee Beers. That team name is reserved for Coop, Remer, and Squeak. We're the Milwaukee Brewers, the guys that make the beer. So what if we're not as cool as pirates; we brew cold fresh joy for thousands. We brew 10,000 bottles of beer a day, and I drink 45 off of the assembly line and I'm the asshole. God damn brewery! I'd give anything in the world to have that feeling back again. A lot of my friends have made the road trip out to Pittsburgh to see the Brewers play the Pirates, and they all conclude that PNC Park is by far the nicest looking stadium in Major League Baseball. Looking at pictures like the one above and watching it on TV make it really look sweet, but I've been told that they really don't do it justice. It's right on the river, and the downtown area unfolds in the backdrop so that you have something to look at when the Pirates are batting. Ouch. Sweet burn. I've always held off going to PNC Park because of the Brewers horrid record there, mostly because I don't like traveling 554 miles to see a loss. Wait, Pittsburgh is only 554 miles from Milwaukee? That's like a 9 hour drive. What the hell have I been waiting for? Unfortunately this was the last time in 2008 that the Brewers would be playing at PNC Park, and I obviously did not go. If I would have, it would have been the first thing that I talked about in here and I would be simply gushing about how sweet of a trip it was. I've just made it my #1 priority for 2009 to make a road trip out here. As soon as the Brewers 2009 schedule comes out, I'm going to block out the days and ask off of work so that I can get out here and visit this gem and see it with my own eyes. I'm sure that I can get some kids willing to go out there. Unless the Pirates somehow figure out how to be a good baseball team, it's almost a guaranteed series victory. Just like this one was. So on with the wrap-up.

Game 1 (Friday) - Dave Bush (9-9, 4.12 ERA) vs Tom Gorzelanny (6-9, 6.61 ERA)

This game was the wild card of the 3 for the Brewers since Suppan is currently 4-0 in August and CC is well, CC. But lest we forget that Dave Bush has also been performing above expectations in the month of August, and we are going against Tom Gorzelanny, who probably isn;t too happy to see us again. In the 2 times that he has faced the Brewers in 2008 (1 start at PNc and 1 star at Miller) he got absolutely shelled by the Crew. In the 1st inning, it looked like the same old Gorzelanny that Brewers fans knew and loved. Rickie Weeks lead off with a single, then JJ Hardy took a walk. Ryan Braun then lasered a shot into the first row bleachers for a quick 3-0 lead. I thought that they were going to keep piling it on against Gorzelanny, but he settled in after that and those 3 runs were the only ones that we would score for the remainder of the game. It was ok though, because Dave Bush was on his game today and he limited the Pirates to 1 run over 6 2/3 innings. Shouse, Gagne, and Torres came in and kept the Pirates off of the scoreboard. So with a win today, things were looking really good going into the rest of the series. Final score Brewers 3, Pirates 1.

Brewers record : 78 - 56, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Saturday) - Jeff Suppan (10-7, 4.49 ERA) vs Paul Maholm (8-8, 3.81 ERA)

I've previously mentioned that Suppan was 4-0 in the month of August. Well, make that 5-0 now. He's been helping himself by going 7 innings and giving up 3 or less runs, but a 7 run cushion from the offense doesn't hurt either. The Brewers scored a few runs early, including Corey Hart's 20th home run of the year in the 2nd inning, giving him the distinction of being the only player in Brewers history to have back-to-back 20/20 seasons (20 homeruns, 20 stolen bases). With great players like Yount and Molitor in their history, that's a pretty sweet distinction. Maholm is a pretty good pitcher, and he kept us in check for most of the game, but we ripped him apart for a 5 run 6th inning that put the game out of reach. Cameron once again was the hero of the day as he finished 2-4 with 4 RBIs, 2 runs scored, and 1 homerun. Not be overlooked, Billy Hall had himself a nice little Saturday too. He went to Home Depot, maybe Bed Bath and Beyond - he doesn't know if he'll have enough time. But he did go 2-5 with 2 RBIs and 2 runs scored. The Brewers kept tacking on runs throughout the game, which is something that they usually fail to do. Case in point - scoring 3 runs in the 1st inning yesterday and then shutting it down. Thankfully the pitching staff keeps shutting down inferior teams like the Pirates. Truth be told, the Brewers really only needed to score 4 runs today, but hey bring on the pain boys. Score them runs, because no lead is safe when the bullpen (Gagne, Riske, Mota) come in to pitch. I personally would have no problem if the Brewers went out and scored 11 runs every game, but that is probably one of the most obvious statements that I have ever made. It would be damn hard for even the worst pitching staff of all time (for example 10 Derrick Turnbows on 1 team with 1 Gagne thrown in for good measure) to lose more than they win when their offense scores 11 runs per game. Since we don't always score 11 runs a game, I'm gonna sit back and enjoy this one. And I'm done. Final score Brewers 11, Pirates 3.

Brewers record : 79 - 56, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 3 (Sunday) - CC Sabathia (15-8, 2.82 ERA) vs Jeff Karstens (2-4, 3.62 ERA)

The pirate is supposed to be fierce, shifty, sneaky, dangerous, crafty and merciless. These Pirates are none of the above. They should just start calling themselves the Pittsburgh Pilates. You know, the exercising method that involves breathing, centering, concentration, control, precision, and flow and efficiency of movement that chicks do. And now I have successfully pissed off a baseball team, the city that loves them, their fan base, and women everywhere. I knew that I had it in me. Truth be told, most teams look silly against CC Sabathia, but the Pirates looked especially silly because they only managed 1 hit in this game that shouldn't have even been a hit. Andy LaRoche hit a check swing bunt towards 3rd base, Sabathia went to bare hand it, picked up the ball, then dropped it, allowing LaRoche to reach 1st base. The official scoring was a base hit, although any pitcher makes that play 10 times out of 10 if they field the ball cleanly. The Brewers tried to argue the call, and even sent in a video and explanation to major league baseball in an attempt to get the call reversed, but the league officials stuck with the original call and Sabathia was denied his 1st career no-hitter. But hey, a 1-hit complete game shut-out is nothing to hang your head upon though. Rickie Weeks lead of the game with a homerun, and like always, that is all that Sabathia needed. That didn't stop the Brewers from tacking on 6 more runs in the 7th and 8th innings though. They decided to kick the Pirates while they were down, and for once it was nice to be on the kicker side of this fight than the kickee side. The Pirates didn't have a chance from the moment that CC stepped on the mound, and this win was an easy one. Hmm... maybe a little too easy. Final score Brewers 7, Pirates 0.

Brewers record : 80 - 56, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

I like Pittsburgh. I like it a lot. Prior to the 2008 season, I didn't really care for it, but now they are my new best friend. I like a best friend that lets you continue to beat them up and doesn't put up too much of a struggle. We still have 3 more games at Miller Park against these Pirates (from September 23-25) so we'll see if we can improve on our current 9-1 record against them. I really don't think that it will be too hard, and it looks like we'll have 3 practice games against this AAA team before the final series of the year against the hated Chicago Cubs. If the Brewers do keep playing this well against Pittsburgh at PNC Park, then I will definitely go there next summer. Who's with me? I know of a few people that I can count in, but I'm looking for someone with a reliable car that could drive my ass out there. Applications will be provided here on Pookon's Ill Blog sometime next year - but only serious parties need apply. So Amanda Hugandkiss, Seemore Butts, Heywood Jablowme, and Oliver Pantsoff : don't even bother. If I see your name on the top of the application, I'm discarding it, no matter how sweet your resume looks. But if you have a car that you are willing to drive me in, then you automatically get the job. I'm looking at you Heywood. Grrrrrrr. Oh, and for the record, Heywood is a chick. Don't you dare be getting the wrong idea Sir or Madam.

Next up - September 1 (Monday) - September 3 (Wednesday) Milwaukee Brewers vs New York Mets at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

- pookon -

http://www.pookon.com/

email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers @ Cardinals 8/26 - 8/27 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 43 - Milwaukee Brewers @ St. Louis Cardinals August 26 - August 27 at Busch Stadium in St. Louis, MO

At this time in the year, every series is huge because we need to keep on winning to keep pace with the Cubs and stave off the vermin nipping at our heels (like the Cardinals and Phillies). This series was especially huge because it is the last time that we play St. Louis during the 2008 season, so it is the last chance that we have to put some distance between us and them for the NL Wild Card. If we win both, we gain 2 games on them. If they win both, they gain two on us. And if we split the 2 game series, we're no worse off then when we got to town. So this series boils down to the very basic gamble - win, lose, or break even. Of course we want to win, but I'll settle with a split. Just as long as we don't get swept and St. Louis gets right back in it and think that they still have a chance at making the playoffs this year. There's a lot of animosity between these two clubs, and I don't think Tony LaRussa likes it very much that Milwaukee is now a better team than St. Louis. I don't think that they are ready for the changing of the guards within the division. Hey Tony - deal with it. And stop being an asshole and asking your pitchers to throw at Ryan Braun. That's bush league. If you were a man I would punch you right in the mouth. But you're not a man, you're a little whiny boy, so I'll just shake the shit outta you. It's only wrong to shake babies, because they're not old enough to handle it. You can surely shake children, but you can't slap or hit them because it's abuse. Or at least that's the way that I know it to be. And I wonder why I keep getting turned down and rejected every time that I attempt to adopt a child so that Gordon has a playmate while I'm away at work. I filled out this questionnaire, and I guess I kept on selecting the wrong answers. Maybe I'm just not mature enough to be responsible for another human life. Maybe when I grow up they'll be a little more lenient down at the adoption agency. Maybe next year when I'm 28 they will finally let me get a kid so that Maximillion Iceman Reck can live a storybook life and train from day 1 to be the World's Greatest Beer Pong player. The spelling error of the first name is intentional so that he can chose to go by Million (instead of the common short name of Max) or by his middle name (Iceman). But such things are more of a dream than a reality, and I keep on getting rejected. Tough luck man. Wait...what was I talking about again? I sort of went off on this wicked made up tangent, and came back and realized that I'm supposed to be writing about the Brewers vs Cardinals series. Man, I totally forgot. And the craziest part about it is that I am 100 % completely sober! I haven't had a drink in like 2 days. That's like a world record for me. And now I just realized how utterly sad and pathetic that was. Maybe my Mom is right and that I really am an alcoholic. Damn it! I hate that my Mom is always right. I'd prove her wrong, but I need a few drinks to work up the courage to confront her about, which totally defeats the point. Damn it. Oh well, on with the sober wrap-up.

Game 1 (Tuesday) - Ben Sheets (12-7, 3.05 ERA) vs Todd Wellemeyer (11-5, 3.85 ERA)

Today Ben Sheets notched a number that he is all too familiar with in his career - 12 wins. It's hard to believe that a staff ace like him has never won more than 12 games in a year, but when you consider how poor the teams that he played on were, and how many times that his year was shortened due to injury, then it all makes sense. Counting 2008, he has won 12 games in a season 3 times (2007, 2004) and 11 games 3 times (2001, 2002, 2003). The other years were injury years that prevented him from getting that high. Sheets has been historically bad against the St. Louis Cardinals in his career, and has been even worse at Busch Stadium (new and old). That is why today was such a sweet surprise. There's a couple different words that you can use to describe what the Brewers did to the Cardinals this game - rout, slaughter, vanquish, clobber, romp, drub, thrash and shellac. Before you go about praising me for being so smart and asking me to be on your Scrabble team for pairs competition, let me reveal some of my secrets. Although I was an English and Journalism Major before settling on Communications, I use the internet for the reason it was intended (and no, not for looking up free porn) - to get information. I went to thesaurus.com, entered the word rout, and got all of these sweet synonyms. I especially dig shellac, because it sounds like something a sweet old man sitting on a porch is his rocking chair would say when recounting a story from his youth. "If I ever disobeyed my mother, she'd give me a shellacking!" This is one of those perfect games where nothing could go wrong. Ben Sheets pitched 6 scoreless innings en route to the victory, the bullpen followed him up by keeping the Cards off the board in the remaining 3, and the offense had a monster night. This offensive output was equally shared by the entire team, as every starter except for Sheets had a basehit and contributed to the scoring outburst via an RBI or a run scored. The Brewers were up 5-0 in the 7th inning and well on their way to victory, then they made this game laughable in the 9th inning when the scored 7 runs, which included a pinch hit homerun by Bill Hall that put the game out of reach. People get on me for my love affair with Bill Hall, but Bill Hall still has the unique ability to win games or put games out of reach. My only complaint about this game is that I was once again stuck at work and I was unable to watch it again. I picked a hell of a year to work a 2nd shift job. The win today guarantees a series split and we can go for the 2 game sweep tomorrow. Final score Brewers 12, Cardinals 0.

Brewers record : 77 - 55, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Wednesday) - Manny Parra (10-6, 4.00 ERA) vs Adam Wainright (7-3, 3.04 ERA)

I was supposed to work from 1:30 - 10:00 pm today, but I put in a request to leave early. There was really no reason to do it, I just didn't feel like being at work today. I was able to leave at 8:40 pm, and when I was walking outside, the bus was just leaving. I don't own a car, so I rely on your other set of wheels to get around town. Out here in Bayside, the bus only runs once every hour later at night. I missed the bus by mere minutes, and knowing that the next bus didn't leave until 9:28 pm, I decided to go to the Speakeasy (local bar) to watch the game and have a few drinks. I was pissed off that I didn't bet on yesterday's game, so I threw down $10.00 on Manny and the Brewers to win. I only intended to stay for 2 beers, but then I started playing bar dice with the bartender and a couple of regulars there, and I ended up losing every time and buying a round of shots for everyone. I was pissed, because I didn't come here to spend money, but I kept on playing hoping that the law of averages would come back to work in my favor and that others would have to buy me shots. It didn't work out that way. The next thing that I knew was that I had missed that 9:28 pm bus, so I decided to stay and watch the game and continue drinking. Everything was fine until the 8th inning when the Brewers let a 3-1 lead slip away. Things got ugly in the bottom of the 7th inning when Carlos Villanueva got out of a bases loaded jam without allowing a run, then got overly excited about it. Albert Pujols, standing in the on deck circle, thought that Carlos pointed towards the dugout in attempt to give them a disrespectful sign, took it personally, and carried it with him to his next at bat. Pujols doubled off of David Riske, then Ludwick doubled him home. Glaus hit a single to score Ludwick, and then 2 more runs scored. I don't care how it happened, nor did I see because I was facedown in spilled beer, Rumplemans, and salsa (the Speakeasy is below a Mexican restaurant). By this time I was pretty wasted and I missed the 10:17 pm bus, so I decided to stay and have a few more beers. Not wanting to miss the 11:06 pm bus, I walked outside for some fresh air with about 20 minutes to spare. While outside, I pondered over Karma and it's effect on me. You see, last year the Brewers were absolutely horrible on the road, and a road game was almost an automatic loss. So to make more money, I started betting against the Brewers on the road. I was pissed because I hate to see them lose, but I profited off of them. Everyone knows that Karma is a real bitch, but I went ahead and started betting on the Brewers to win this year. Every time that I bet on a pitcher not named CC Sabathia (cause no amount of Karma or divine intervention could stop that beast) I lost, as was the case tonight. I'd like to place the blame on Riske and Shouse for giving up those 4 runs in the 8th inning, but truthfully I have no one to blame but myself. So once again, I am personally responsible for the loss today. And don't try to tell me otherwise. So I was double upset over the loss today, and no amount of drinking could change that. So I guess my Mom was right after all - drinking is not the answer, it is the problem. Damn it. Final score Cardinals 5, Brewers 3.

Brewers record : 77 - 56, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

So it looks like we're no worse off than when we got to town, and we broke even here in St. Louis. We were in line to win both games, and I really wish that we could have. The bullpen is starting to falter again this year, but at least our starting pitching has been nothing short of amazing. So no harm, no foul. But it really would have been nice to stick it to the Cardinals and push them out of the playoff hunt. The Rolling Stones said, "You can't always get what you want", but I never listened to singing undead zombies, so I say that I can always get what I want. I guess this time either God wasn't listening or He had other plans for me, because I wanted the Brewers to win. I always want the Brewers to win. So I guess those corpses were right after all. We'll see who is right when I bash them in the head with a shovel or blow their brains out with a shotgun. My friends and I will fall back into a strategic battleground known as the local mall and ward off any creatures of the living dead. Using equipment from the Radio Shack, hardware store, and sports store, we will defend ourselves against those slow moving bastards who want to eat our brains. Not on my watch you zombie punks. Once again, I've gone off on a tangent and my focus has shifted away from the Brewers and on to something completely different. I have no idea how or why I do it, but it's shit like that that makes me me. You could go anywheres to read a basic statistical analysis of the Brewers games, but there's only one place that you can go to read about shaking children, Karma's revenge, shellacking, and fighting off Rolling Stone Zombies and Brewers analysis at the same time. That place is here, and whether you come here often or stumbled upon it randomly, you are now considered family. Bring it in for the real thing brother! Well, I gotta go cook up some more random shit in my brain to type for next time, so until then - don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you!

Next up - August 29 (Friday) - August 31 (Sunday) Milwaukee Brewers @ Pittsburgh Pirates at PNC Park in Pittsburgh, PA

- pookon -

http://www.pookon.com/

email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers vs Pirates 8/22 - 8/24 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 42 - Milwaukee Brewers vs Pittsburgh Pirates August 22 - August 24 at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

There's those teams that are as good if not better than you, and there's those teams that you should beat. And then here's the Pirates. Let's not kid ourselves here; the Pirate is by far the coolest mascot and emblem that a team could ever wear. What the hell is cooler than a Pirate? Your silence shows that you cannot come up with an answer. Hell, even the almighty Scwab is stumped right now. That's because there is nothing cooler than a Pirate. So why then do the Pittsburgh Pirates suck so much? They've been scrapping the bottom of the barrel in the NL Central since God knows when, and barring a miracle, they will be heading towards their 16th consecutive losing season. For a while there, the Brewers were in their position, and it seemed like they would never get out of the cellar of the National League Central division. And then came 2005, when they finally earned a non-losing season by finishing at 81-81, with their last series of the year that ended the losing drought against these very same Pirates. In 2006, they took a step backwards due to injuries, and finished at 75 - 87, but they rebounded nicely in 2007 by going 83 - 79 and earning their first winning season since 1992 when the Brewers finished 92-70, but missed the playoffs because at the time there was no Wild Card team in the playoffs. So I can identify with the Pittsburgh Pirates, and I can understand how hard it must be to be a fan of these guys. The Brewers made the right move by selling the team to Mark Atanasio, and he sunk some dollars into this franchise, and committed to building a winner through the draft, trades, and free agency. Hopefully the Pirates can regain the notoriety that they once had as one of baseball's oldest and best franchises, but until them, I just hope that we beat the living piss out of team that is by far inferior to ours. No offense Pittsburgh, but Milwaukee is better than you are at this given point in time. Deal with it. Nothing but love, but you've already won a World Series; I want to see my team win one too. So I want nothing more than for my team to beat yours as many times as possible on the way to the top. With that having been said, let's get on with the wrap-up.

Game 1 (Monday) - Dave Bush (8-9, 4.24 ERA) vs Zach Duke (4-12, 5.29 ERA)

Dave Bush continued his 2nd half amazing run by once again going 7 innings and allowing 3 runs or less. I believe that it is called a quality start, which is often used to measure the effectiveness of a pitcher. I guess I can see the logic behind it, because if a starter goes 7 and allows 3 runs or less, it only gives the bullpen 2 innings in which to screw it. If your setup man and closer can hold the lead, then your offense only has to score no more than 4 runs. It's simple math. Hell, even a complete moron like me can figure it out. This one had all the makings of a close game, as it was 4-3 Milwaukee going into the bottom half of the 7th inning. And then the Brewers turned up the heat against Pittsburgh. Leading the way was Mike Cameron, who after a slow start, is getting his batting average back up to a respectable number (.248). While that doesn't seem like a lot, he is only a career .251 hitter. As long as he plays spectacular defense and hits for power (22 HR and 56 RBI) I'll take it. This went from a nail-biter to a laugher in one quick inning, as the Brewers almost batted around (Lance Nix, as a pinch hitter led off the inning, and was in the on deck circle when Kendall grounded into an inning ending double play) and 6 runs crossed the plate. If not for that double play, we could have poured it on some more. But hey, no need to embarrass these guys any more, we'll save some more for tomorrow. Final score Brewers 10, Pirates 4.

Brewers record : 74 - 54, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Tuesday) - Jeff Suppan (9-7, 4.58 ERA) vs Tom Gorzelanny (6-8, 6.82 ERA)

Suppan matched Dave Bush's performance almost to a T, although I really don't understand what that means. I checked online but gave up when the first site gave me a biography and photo gallery of iconic actor Mr. T. Oh, and I stopped looking because once you find a comprehensive Mr. T website, there's really no use looking around on the internet for more information. You've stumbled upon a virtual treasure trove of badass pictures, gaudy jewelry, and lovable catch phrases like "I pity the fool" and "I ain't got no time for the jibba jabber fool!". But I'll save the Mr. T stuff for later, because this is a Brewers wrap-up, not a Mr. T. wrap-up. Suppan has been putting together a really nice August, and it has gone relatively unnoticed thanks to the masterpieces that CC has been painting since he joined the Brewers. Hell, even Mother Theresa or Benjamin Franklin's accomplishments pale in comparison to what CC has put together in 7 short weeks. But enough about CC (I'll save that for tomorrow) it's Soup's time to bask in the glory. But like always (except when he was named the National League Championship Series MVP in 2006) Soup is overshadowed by someone else because he's not a very flashy player. Ryan Braun hit his 32nd home run of the year, and contributed 3 of the 6 RBIs in the game today. The Brewers built up a 6-0 lead by the 5th inning, but Pittsburgh scratched a couple of runs late to at least make it look like it was a ball game. And just like they've done all season long, Pittsburgh lost today. There are teams that I hate (the Chicago Cubs, New York Yankees, Boston Red Sox) but I love teams like the Pirates because they let us beat them. Hooray! Final score Brewers 6, Pirates 3.

Brewers record : 75 - 55, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 3 (Sunday) - CC Sabathia (14-8, 2.95 ERA) vs Paul Maholm (8-7, 3.62 ERA)

CC Sabathia was due to have a bad outing. After all, there's no way that he could have stayed perfect all year. But a bad outing for CC is only going 6 innings while giving up 1 run instead of a complete game shut-out. But he can't be perfect every day. He did leave the game with the Brewers clinging to a 2-1 lead, but David Riske (I still think that it is too early to consider him a bust, he can still turn it around just like Guillermo Mota has done) blew it in the 7th and CC had to settle for a no decision. Mike Cameron (big time hero as of late) put the Brewers ahead with his 4th hit of the day which also happened to be a solo homerun. Torres came on for the save, but apparently if CC cannot be perfect today, then no one can. He allowed a run and this game went to extra innings. I was working this game, and although I got off at the end of the 7th inning, I stuck around to watch all of the extra innings, except for the one that counted the most. Tonight was the live in person draft for my Fantasy Football league with my family and close friends, and it is one of the high points of my year. My brother Tim was on his way down to the Eastside, so he offered to pick me up as long as I could leave right then. So with Guillermo Mota on the mound and the Pirates threatening to score, I packed it in and headed out the door. Like a true Goonie, I never say die, and although I desperately wanted to stay to see how this game shook out, a free ride is a free ride. For those of you who have cars and take that shit for granted - you probably don't understand how valuable a free ride to/from work is for me. It can take me anywhere from 1 to 1 1/2 hours to get to work at Miller Park from the Eastside, depending on the traffic. It sucks balls, but I don't have enough money to buy a car. So I took the free ride home. Of course then Mota got out of the jam, then in the bottom of the 12th inning, Weeks walks, steals 2nd, then comes home on Hardy's single to win the game. Would've been sweet to see this one, but if I had to do it again, I'd probably still take the free ride. There's about 81 home games a year, but free rides come once every blue moon. You can't put a price on free man. But someone was allowed to be perfect today, as Mike Cameron went 5-for-5 with 2 RBIs to raise his batting average up to .257. That's awesome. Now if only Weeks and Hall could take lessons, then Mr. Hammond, I think we'd be back in business. Although today was exciting, hold on to your butts because it's only going to get crazier as we enter September. Good show today. Oh, and the Fantasy Football draft was a blast, although I am not very satisfied with the way that I drafted my team. That's $25 bucks out the window that could have been better spent on strippers and booze. Final score Brewers 4, Pirates 3.

Brewers record : 76 - 55, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Another 3 game series and another 3 game sweep of the Pirates. I bet those scalawags hate playing us. They'll get their chance to make us walk the plank when we board their vessel and try to pillage and plunder their booty next weekend (August 29 - 31) at PNC Park. If they don't beat us there (wink wink) then we can dutifully proclaim that we are indeed a better team than these Pirates. I don't need a win/loss column or a stat filled Excel spreadsheet to tell me that, but things like this always look good on paper. And this sweep caps off a 5-1 homestand, and with every win we creep closer towards that 90 win marker, which I hope is enough to get us into the playoffs for the 1st time since 1982. I think it would be bullshit if we won 90 + games and didn't make the playoffs, but stranger things have happened before. So kiss your lucky rabbit's foot, knock on wood, cross your fingers and do all that other ridiculous superstitious shit in an attempt to bring the playoff drought to an end. You'll thank yourself when you get to see your Milwaukee Brewers playing October baseball. You'll be glad that you did, because it will take the focus off of the Green Bay Packers and how much Aaron Rodgers sucks. I hope that I will be wrong about that one, but I want nothing more than to be right about the Brewers making the playoffs in 2008.

Next up - August 26 (Tuesday) - August 27 (Wednesday) Milwaukee Brewers @ St. Louis Cardinals at Busch Stadium in St. Louis, MO

- pookon -

http://www.pookon.com/
email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers vs Astros 8/18 - 8/20 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 41 - Milwaukee Brewers vs Houston Astros August 18 - August 20 at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

I'm normally pretty chill about a lot of things, and it isn't because they call me the Iceman. People think that I got that name because I'm cool under pressure, but in a lot of circumstances I'm the complete opposite. I'll just go ahead and let people think whatever they want, but sometimes I do get all riled up about something. Cecil Cooper (Coop) made some pretty ridiculous remarks to the media before this series in Milwaukee. Houston likes to think that they still have a shot at the wildcard, but they came into this series at least 7 games back. They have been playing pretty well lately, and Coop boldly predicted that his team would sweep the Brewers and gain 3 games on them for the NL Wildcard. I really like Coop, and he will always be treasured for his contributions to the Milwaukee Brewers in helping them reach the playoffs for the 1st and only time in 1982, but he needs to keep his mouth shut. I know that no one should go into a series saying they are going to lose, but saying that you'll sweep a team that is better than you at their home ballpark is asinine. I could understand him saying that if they were going against Suppan, Parra, and Bush, but CC and Sheets? No way dude. The Cubs couldn't even beat CC (although they did win the game, but they did it against Torres. CC didn't lose the game), so how do you expect the Astros to do it without Carros Ree? Sure, they still have Rance Berkman and Miguer Tejada, but neither of them are the RBI machine that Carros Ree is. Without Ree, the Astros will continue to be a bunch of sirry rosers. Oh werr, on with this wrap-up.

Game 1 (Monday) - CC Sabathia (14-8, 2.99 ERA) vs Randy Wolf (8-11, 4.81 ERA)

Today's game contained some of the fodder that keeps talk radio in business. CC Sabathia came out and dominated the Astros and was well on his way for his 8th victory during his time with the Brewers. The Crew had a 7-2 lead in the 6th inning, and tacked on single runs in the 7th and 8th innings to give them a comfortable lead. But yet CC was left in to pitch a complete game and ending up throwing 130 pitches. Last year, the bullpen was overworked because our starters weren't going deep into games. This year, our starters are going too deep into games and our bullpen is getting rusty. This would have been a perfect game to get a couple of those arms (Shouse, Riske) in the game to get some action. Pitchers thrive on repetition, so sitting around out in left field chewing on sunflower seeds doesn't help them pitch better off of a mound. I'm all for CC throwing complete games, because sometimes I get a little nervous when Mota or Gagne comes in to pitch, but 130 pitches when your team has a comfortable margin is ridiculous. We don't need CC's arm to fall off in the playoffs. I know that the guy is a beast (or a horse) but enough is enough. I'd like to blame Ned, but I'm thinking that this isn't his call. How many times have we seen Sheets get all fired up when Ned comes to take him out? A starting pitcher wants to go out and throw all 9 innings, get the win, and keep the other team off of the board. No one wants to exit the game. I'm sure Ned asked CC if he could do it, and CC said he wanted to stay in and finish the game. Ned could have pulled him because he's the boss, but that just goes to show you that Ned is a player's manager and trusts his players to be open and honest. By not babying them (they are all grown men, and not only that, but they are well trained athletes) and telling them what to do, and having the confidence in his players to make their own decision, the players then trust themselves. It comes around full circle, and it seems to be working in the Brewers' favor. Time will tell on that, but apparently it's a big enough issue for me to spend time talking about it. Have we just made it too big of an issue than it already was? Probably, but since the offense was so good today, that is the only thing from this game that comes out as semi-negative. Oh, and the Brewers scored 9 runs today, and only 1 of them was via the homerun. That's a great sign, because if they can do it now, then they should be able to do it in September and October. Final score Brewers 9, Astros 3.

Brewers record : 72 - 54, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Tuesday) - Ben Sheets (11-7, 3.16 ERA) vs Brian Moehler (9-4, 3.87 ERA)

So CC throws a complete game and limits the number of runs allowed, then the next day Ben Sheets goes out and gets rocked. This is becoming an all too familiar story that I am sick and tired of having to write about. I'm not going to sit here and place any more blame on Sheets, we all know that he's pitching like crap right now. Hell, even he knows it, and he's addressed it to the media when they keep asking him the same G D questions. Hopefully this means that he's saving up his good games for September, because if he's lights out, then we will be an unstoppable juggernaut. The bigger problem at hand is the fact that Ben Sheets has never won more than 12 games in a season despite consistently sporting a low ERA. Why? Lack of run support. There's stats to prove it, but I won't bore you with them right now, but if you've been watching the games that Sheets has pitched since the All-Star Break, you'd see that he has to be damn near perfect to record a victory. How else do you explain the fact that he has only won 1 game since the break while his ERA virtually hasn't changed? Case in point - the Brewers scored 2 early runs then shut it down for the rest of the day. While Sheets wasn't his best (he gave up 5 runs in 6 innings) you can't expect to win when you only score 2 runs. I'm tired of complaining, so I'm going to move on to game 3. Hopefully I can pull a positive rabbit out of that hat. Final score Astros 5, Brewers 2.

Brewers record : 72 - 55, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 3 (Sunday) - Manny Parra (10-6, 4.10 ERA) vs Wandy Rodriguez (7-6, 4.11 ERA)

Manny rebounded nicely from his last start, and while he once again failed to go deep into the game, it wasn't necessarily a bad thing. In my posting on Manny's last start, I mentioned that he was close to topping (if he hasn't already topped) his number of innings pitched in a season. Down the stretch run, you start to get concerned about the little things, but you have to make sure that the little things don't get in the way of the big picture, like winning ball games. Because it doesn't matter how many innings Manny throws in a season if the Brewers can't find a way to win and make it to the playoffs. But they did find a way to win today, so we won't worry about that until tomorrow. Let's just take it one day at a time folks. The Brewers won today, and found a way to take the series against Houston. And JJ Hardy, who is lighting up my fantasy baseball team, hit his 19th home run of the year and helped me to increase my statistical dominance over the opposition. Woo-hoo!! Final score Brewers 5, Astros 2.

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Brewers record : 73 - 55, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

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So Coop was wrong. You could probably see that one coming a mile away. I know that he is a first year manager, so let me give him a nickels worth of free advice. Wanna know how to rile up your opponents? Come into town and say that you're going to sweep them. People (especially athletes) love it when you tell them that they are going to lose, and lose bad. And get swept at their own park by someone in their own division. Coop, that was probably the worst thing that you could have done. Now our players went out of their way to prove you wrong. If Pittsburgh and Cincinnati weren't so terribly bad, then you would be fighting for the basement in the NL Central. But relax Coop, you just might finish at .500 this year, with a possible winning record if you play well. You have no shot at the wild card or division title, but hey, at least you tried. That's more than I can say for Pittsburgh and Cincinnati. They traded away all of their best players in yet another rebuilding year. Long term mainstays such as the Pirates' Jason Bay (traded to the Red Sox) and Xavier Nady (New York Yankees) are gone, and Ken Griffey Jr. (Chicago White Sox) and Adam Dunn (Arizona Diamondbacks) are playing for contenders. All the while when Milwaukee went out and got CC Sabathia. I've been there, so I know how it feels when your team sells off it's biggest stars, and I hope it never happens again to the Brew Crew. But since it will, I hope that we can at least be competitive, instead of just thinking that we are like this Houston group. But hey, at least their trying. It's so cute that the Astros think that they can sit at the grown up table with the adults. Not so fast Houston, back to the kids table and finish your chicken fingers and Jello. In a few years you can talk about Adult topics like laundry, politics, and retirement plans. For now, just sit back and enjoy Hannah Montana and SpongeBob Squarepants.

Next up - August 22 (Friday) - August 24 (Sunday) Milwaukee Brewers vs Pittsburgh Pirates at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

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- pookon -

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http://www.pookon.com/
email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

It's as easy as shooting fish in a barrel...

...which is really not that easy if you think about it. Why do they say that then? I haven't been fishing in a few years, but I used to go back with my grandparents when I was younger. If I recall, fish are very slippery and when you take them off the hook and try to put them somewhere, they flip around violently and try to break free. And throwing a slippery moving object? There's no way in hell that that is easy, and trust me, I know. I've made a living out of throwing wet objects (ping pong balls) into barrels (plastic cups) so you can consider me an expert on the subject.

I assume that they are talking about live fish being thrown into the barrel, or else the quote would be "it's as easy as throwing dead fish in a barrel!" I haven't handled a whole lot of dead fish in my day, but I'd have to imagine that a cold dead lifeless fish would be easier to grab a hold of than a live one. One of these days, I'll become a real journalist, question professionals and do some on the scene investigation, which would allow for factual reporting instead of assumptions. But then of course, I would have to actually try, meet deadlines, and be professional. And I don't think that professionals are allowed to write stories about shooting fish in a barrel complete with a sweet twisted picture that makes sense and doesn't make sense at the same time. That having been said, I don't see myself ever becoming a professional journalist. This shit that I do here is just way too much fun.

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So this just goes to show you that some things don't make sense when you sit down, break it apart, and ponder over the meaning of the statement. We throw these sayings into the conversation without any thought or warning of the ramifications of their use. When someone says "it's as easy as shooting fish in a barrel" you need to figure out that the person who said it is in fact lying to you, because this sort of thing is not easy. Someone who lies is not a trustworthy person, and if that person is your friend, then it also causes you to reexamine your relationship with that person. You think back to all of the moments you have shared, and it makes you doubt some of the things they told you in confidence. Did their parents really leave them stranded at Wal-Mart when they were 6 years old (which lead them to believe they were neglected as children) or did they just make that story up to gain sympathy? You no longer are able to trust to your friend, and it was all because they used a common phrase without thinking.

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There are plenty of other phrases that people use with reckless abandon, and I don't want to take up too much of your time, but use caution when uttering these phrases :

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"killing 2 birds with 1 stone" - the person who said this is a homicidal and sadistic murder who takes pleasure in killing defenseless animals with blunt objects.

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"a penny saved is a penny earned" - don't expect this person to pay for drinks or leave a tip. This person will use you for your money and and will put a drain on your wallet.

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"there's no sense in crying over spilled milk" - why the hell not? If someone loves milk, and spilled it, I can see crying about it. If I dropped a case of beer or a bottle of rum and it broke, I'd be balling my eyes out. You can't tell me when to or when not to cry. I can cry if I want to dammit. Then I'd dry my tears, lie face down on the ground, and slurp up every last drop of alcohol. I paid for that shit, and I'll be damned if plants and ants get drunk at my expense.

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"the devil is in the details" - no, the devil is in hell. People that don't know that are idiots.

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"let the cat out of the bag" - seriously, who keeps cats in bags? PETA should get at these people for animal cruelty. Cats should be on farms or chilling on window sills.

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"curiosity killed the cat" - no, it was keeping the cat in the bag with no food, water, or air that killed the cat.

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And my favorite, "it's always in the last place that you look" - of course it is, why would you keep looking for something once you've already found it?

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Avoid using these phrases and the countless others that sound just like them, and you will avoid sounding like a jackass. If each person who reads this does that, then we will have less morons in this world. But since I'm going to keep shooting fishes in barrels and taking everything except the kitchen sink (f*ck the kitchen sink), this world is screwed. I know that you'll keep doing it too, so all hope for mankind is lost for all time. But when it rains it pours, we will put all of our eggs in one basket, beat a dead horse, burn the midnight oil, burn bridges, burn the candle at both ends, take a shot in the dark, and judge books by their covers. We're all gonna die. God help us.

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- pookon -

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http://www.pookon.com/

email : pookondotcom@gmail.com

Brewers @ Dodgers 8/15 - 8/17 : Series Wrap-Up

Series 40 - Milwaukee Brewers @ Los Angeles Dodgers August 15 - August 17 at Dodger Stadium in Los Angeles, CA

I really wanted to be in Los Angeles for this series. It has been far too many years since I have been to Southern California, and I've been itching to go back. My Aunt and Uncle lived out there for much of my childhood, so we would go visit them every year around Christmas. When my Dad was working for Miller Brewery, my Mom and brother and sister moved out there for 6 long months. I went back to visit family and friends out there for several years, but that all changed when my Dad moved away from California. As far as I can recall, I haven't been back there since 2005 when we went out there for our friend Craig's Wedding. For someone who used to go there every year, it's been a little odd to go this long. I have since supplemented my need for West Coast mentality and In-N-Out Burger by making a yearly pilgrimage to Las Vegas for the World Series of Beer Pong, but it just isn't the same since there is no Ocean in Las Vegas. I was planning on going to see Craig, and also take some time to hang with the Film 101 Crew (the guys behind Last Cup : Road to the World Series of Beer Pong, the documentary that I am in) but I just couldn't do it. I spent all of my reserve money going to Las Vegas for the film premiere in mid June, and used up all of my vacation time when I went to Afterglow during the last week of July. With no money and no time, I had no choice but to watch these games from the safety of my living room on the East Side of Milwaukee. While I have no doubt that it would've been a sweet trip, my lack of vacation time and lack of funds made it impossible for me to know the truth. Besides, judging from the end results, 2 out of the 3 games would have been tough to watch. Uh-oh, I just spilled the beans. Not like you didn't already know. Ok then, on with the wrap-up.

Game 1 (Friday) - Manny Parra (9-6, 4.12 ERA) vs Chad Billingsley (12-9, 3.10 ERA)

Remember when Manny Parra was 9-2? I remember a little bit, but it is quickly fading. What started out as a very promising rookie campaign (although he technically is not qualified as a rookie because of service time) has headed south as of late. And you know, it's not like he's getting rocked for like 8 runs every time out, it's like he just isn't as sharp as he was midseason. I know that people are going to point out that he has exceeded his inning limit already this year, and that he should be used sparingly to avoid injury, and they may say that he's tired. I don't think that he is tired yet, but you can definitely see how much more pressure there is in during a full year at the Major League level versus the Minor Leagues. He's feeling it, and although has said that he will keep his rotation in place throughout the rest of the year, something has to be done to avoid Manny breaking down due to overwork. After all, we need him for the stretch run and possibly the playoffs. The Brewers scored 3 early runs, courtesy of Gabe Kapler's 2 run homerun. Kapler has been filling in for the injured Braun, and he has been doing a fantastic job. It's great to have quality veteran backups. Kapler is right up there with Torres and Kendall as best signing ever by Doug Melvin. I can't possibly heap any more praise upon them then I already have. But I certainly will try. Oh yeah, and Parra gave up 4 runs off of 10 hits in just 5 2/3 innings. Ugh. After the 1st 2 innings, the Brewers were basically shut down by the Dodgers pitching staff, and this game was over. Not a very good way to start off the series. Final score Dodgers 5, Brewers 3.

Brewers record : 70 - 53, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 2 (Saturday) - Dave Bush (7-9, 4.26 ERA) vs Derek Lowe (9-10, 3.99 ERA)

I should really be ashamed of myself. Although I was available to watch the game in its entirety, I chose to drink and work on my website. I'm a bit behind, so I decided that I could kill two birds with one stone (I hate myself for using that common and overused idiom) by typing and keeping the Brewers ESPN Gamecast open on the side of the screen. Since I was in the middle of moving, I only had 1 TV in my room (which is a rarity) and had to flip between the TV and my computer to watch the game or type. I was all liquored up, and when I do that, I usually feel like working on the site. I couldn't deny my inner creative genius from coming out and knocking out some of those long awaited web pages. Turns out that I missed one hell of a game to have my attention divided. Kapler, Cameron, and Hart each made fantastic unbelievable catches to save extra base hits, runs from scoring, and in Kapler's case, homeruns. Kapler's catch took him into the stands in left field, and it outdid Hart and Cameron because robbing a homerun always takes precedence on SportsCenter's web gems. If they allow more than 10, then all 3 catches would have made it. But they usually choose the best of the 3, and Kapler's catch will surely go down as one of the best defensive gems for the Brewers all season. Bush got lucky with the defense playing well behind him, but he also was good as he only allowed 2 runs off of 5 hits in 7 innings. JJ Hardy had himself a roller coaster 8th - 10th innings though. In the 8th, he hit a 2 run homerun that put the Brewers up 3 -2, then committed a costly error in the 9th that tied the game at 3 and cost Bush the win. But then he came through in the 10th inning with a single that scored Ray Durham from 2nd. Riske flirted with danger in the 10th, but struck out Manny Ramirez to end the game and I jumped around my empty room with drunken glee. Then I settled down, took a couple of victory shots, then resumed work on the sight. Great night all around. I just wish that I was able to watch the game and move at the same time. Moving is a real bitch. Final score Brewers 4, Dodgers 3.

Brewers record : 71 - 53, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

Game 3 (Sunday) - Jeff Suppan (8-7, 4.62 ERA) vs Clayton Kershaw (2-3, 3.59 ERA)

(Written before the game) I hope that Jeff Suppan got a little bit of home cookin' at his LA area restaurant Soup's Grill, because he's going to need all the sustenance he can get to perform at an elevated level. The Brewers desperately needed a win to close out the road trip, so that the long ass flight from LA to Milwaukee isn't spent sulking. We want them to spend in celebrating and harassing the stewardesses...errr....flight attendants.

This game was as exciting as harassing flight attendants, getting arrested by the air marshal on the plane, being thrown in jail, appearing in court and paying fines; and it was just as painful too. Despite being a Sunday, I was unable to watch this game because I was moving all of the shit that I was not able to move on Thursday. So while Paul and I were carrying desk, dressers and couches up and down the stairs, the Brewers were busy getting beat by the Dodgers. Soup had a Suppan like day, as he allowed 4 runs on 9 hits in 6 innings. The offense was kept in check for 8 innings, but then suddenly awoke and remembered that they were playing baseball in the 9th inning. When I last heard the score, it was 5-1 in the 9th inning, and I was outside of radio contact from then on. When I heard that the Brewers scored 4 runs in the top of the 9th inning, I was ecstatic. The Brewers manufactured 2 runs, then Ryan Braun, playing in his first game in nearly a week, hit a 2 run homer in the 9th to tie it all up at 5-5. But then Villanueva gave up a walk off homerun to Andre Ethier with a man on 1st, then suddenly that comeback was wiped away and the Brewers were walking off the field while the Dodgers ganged up on Ethier at home plate. I'm almost glad I didn't see/hear it, because I don't know that I can handle that up and down influx of emotions. But I wish that I would have seen it, because a true Brewer fans rides along with the good and the bad, the ups and the downs, and the wins and the losses. I consider myself to be true Brew. But I just couldn't this day, because moving just really kicked my ass. Rough day all around, but I'm glad that it is over. Final score Dodgers 7, Brewers 5.

Brewers record : 71 - 54, 2nd place NL Central, 1st place NL Wild Card

So it didn't end exactly like we wanted it to, and although we lost this series, we still went 3-3 on this West Coast roadtrip. That's better than anything that we have done in years past, and in no means is it something to hang your head over. Although the Brewers are without a doubt better than both of these teams on paper, it is still a tall order to ask a visiting team to win or sweep the the series on the road. Baseball is one sport where there is such a homefield advantage, because the home team can decide the fate of the game with one swing of the bat and then it is over. Case in point - Ethier's walk off homerun in the 9th inning of Sunday's game. The Brewers scrapped so hard to come back and tie it, and all it takes is one homerun and the game is over. There's no extra innings, no shootouts or overtime. Game over man, game over. That's it. THAT IS IT. 1 team goes home happy and one team goes home sad. But it's ok, because the Dodgers have a bigger uphill climb to make it to the playoffs, but they can thank their lucky stars they only have to beat the Diamondbacks. We still have to beat the Cubs and Cardinals, the 1st and 3rd best teams in the league. But hey, I'll take a 3-3 roadtrip then come home to face the Houston Astros and the Pittsburgh Pirates. Play .500 on the road and clean up at home, and you'll be rockin' in the playoffs. But enough with that playoffs talk, we still have September to go until we can worry about the postseason. We gotta finish what's left on our plates before we even consider desert. Mmmm.... desert.

Next up - August 18 (Monday) - August 20 (Wednesday) Milwaukee Brewers vs Houston Astros at Miller Park in Milwaukee, WI

- pookon -

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