Brewers Hunger Strike

This shit has got to end. I'm not going to join the "Done Club" or stop watching the Brewers. I would never do that. But something is wrong with the Milwaukee Brewers. They have now lost 8 games in a row and were set to break out of that funk when Trevor Hoffman blew his 5th save of the season and drop the Brewers to an all time low. Sure, it's been worse. I remember working at Miller Park in 2003 when the Brewers lost 106 games and we were lucky to draw 15,000 fans a game. I was in my 2nd season of work there and I was often sent home early because I was low on the seniority. Of course I always stuck around to watch the end of the game, but it was really difficult to do that. I hope with all of my heart that it doesn't revert back to those days. I have decided to go on another Hunger Strike to try and end the Brewers losing streak. This will be my 3rd time starting a Hunger Strike but it will be the 1st time that I am doing it for a specific reason. I vow not to eat until the Brewers win a game. If they happen to win tomorrow (Wednesday May 19) against the Pittsburgh Pirates, then I will amend my Hunger Strike to last until the Brewers win a series. Desperate times call for desperate measures and these are truly desperate times as far as I'm concerned. I haven't seen the Brewers play this bad in the past 7 years, and unlike Ken Macha I didn't live through Prohibition, the Stock Market Crash, the Great Depression, World War II and all of the other troubling times in US History over the past 80 years. So I don't know how to deal with adversary.

So I have nothing left to do but go on a Hunger Strike to do my part in reversing the voodoo curse that has been placed on the Brewers in 2010. On paper they are not this bad. I profiled all of the players on the 2010 Opening Day roster on this blog and told you about my opinion on each of the players. While there are some players that I don't necessarily care for (Gregg Zaun, Jody Gerut, Doug Davis and Jeff Suppan to name a few) there is no way that the Brewers should be 15-24 as of May 18th. The most ridiculous stat is that the Brewers are currently 4-14 at home in Miller Park. In all of the years of bad Brewers teams that I have watched over the years, the one consistent thing was that the Brewers were a good home team. I know you hate stats but here are the home/road splits over the last few years.

2005: 46-35 home, 35-46 road.
2006: 48-33 home, 27-54 road.
2007: 51-30 home, 32-49 road.
2008: 49-32 home, 41-40 road.
2009: 40-41 home, 40-41 road.
2010: 4-14 home, 11-10 road.

As you can see, the Brewers have historically played better underneath the roof at Miller Park. For a team that owes it's payroll to 3 million + fans walking through the turnstiles at home, that's not a really good way to keep the home crowd happy.

We just got swept AT HOME by the Atlanta Braves and Philadelphia Phillies on the last homestand. That shit was fucking pathetic. I can no longer sugar coat it. The Atlanta Braves came to Milwaukee with a 5-and-fucking-14 road record and they won ALL 3 GOD DAMN GAMES HERE. That is inexcusable. I can understand the Phillies beating us because they are the best team in the National League. But that still doesn't mean that they should sweep us. We should at least be able to steal a game from them. But for the Milwaukee Brewers in 2010, every day they find another way to lose.

On most days it is the starting pitching. Adding Randy Wolf and Doug Davis was supposed to stabilize the rotation and add "innings eaters" to the starting 5. But the common theme this year is that the Brewers starters reach the 100 pitch count by the 5th inning and end up giving up a shit ton of runs in the 6th inning because they are all tired out. Then the bullpen has to cover the last 3 innings of the game and all hell breaks loose. One day Carlos Villanueva gives up a boatload of runs. Then the next day Todd Coffey gives up 5 earned runs. Then the next day after that, Trevor Hoffman blows another save. But before that, the Brewers pitching staff has a good day but the offense decides to score only 2 runs. Then Prince Fielder goes 0-4 at the plate and strands a couple of runners in scoring position. I don't need to go on, because you get the point that every single fucking game the Brewers find another way to lose. It's frustrating. If you can't already tell I'm on the edge and just about to lose it. Something has to change and it needs to happen really soon because the excuse of "well, it's still early in the season" only works for a few more days. At 39 game into the season, we're just about 1/4th of the way into the year (40.5 would be the actual mark). The 25% point is a pretty indication of how the season is going to play out because once players have over 100 at bats, you get a pretty good indication of where they are going to end up. And it also shows you how the team as a whole is doing.

Maybe my expectations were too high. After 2008 when the Brewers reached the playoffs for the first time in 26 years they followed that up with an 80-82 record with the worst pitching staff in all of baseball in 2009. I though that Randy Wolf and Doug Davis could bring the staff back to average (with the maturation of Yovani Gallardo and Manny Parra) and the offense would win more games than they would lose. Technically it is still early (but when does that phrase no longer apply?) but it is almost June. I'm sick and tired of this shit! It's no fair that my teams (Brewers, Packers and Bucks) don't get to win Championships. But that is a different topic for a different day. It's summer, so for now I will concentrate on the Brewers.

Whew. Long story short I am going on a Hunger Strike until the Brewers win a game. If they happen to beat Pittsburgh in game 1 of the 2 game series (which is very likely) then I will be on my Hunger Strike until the Brewers win a series. I don't know if my actions will cause the Brewers to right their wrongs and start winning again, but it certainly won't hurt. Hell, some people fast for 40 days and 40 nights in preparation for the coming of Christ and some fucker named Gandhi took long fasts as a means of both self-purification and social protest. So if that shit worked for Gandhi it can work for me. Throughout my life I have believed that I am an instrument of God, and right now God wants me to go on a Hunger Strike to help the Brewers win. The Lord does work in mysterious ways. If any of you want to join me in this quest feel free to abstain from eating until the Brewers win a game or the series. When they get on a roll (as all good teams do) we will rejoice in the fact that it was our actions that caused the Brewers 2010 season to take the massive turnaround that was necessary to salvage the season.

I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get the Brewers back on the winning path. Lord knows that I'm dedicated to this team and will go to extremes to get that record back above .500. Will it be enough? If I go on a Hunger Strike will it really help the team win? Are they really just that bad? Will Lassie ever alert the town Sheriff that Timmy is stuck in the well? All these answers and more are coming soon on the next edition of Pookon's Ill Blog. Hopefully by then I'll be eating because the Brewers have figured out how to starting winning again.

- pookon -

www.pookon.com
email: pookondotcom@gmail.com