I'm not very good at doing physical labor. Walking, standing up for a long time, carrying objects, going up on a ladder, yard work, painting, fixing things, using my hands except for writing, being active or anything else normal people do. I'm not saying that I can't do those things. I'm not so useless that I sit on the couch all day unable to move without the assistance of those cranes they use to lift beached whales. I can get around in the World without having to use a Rascal scooter to support my critically obese body. I just said that I'm not very good at doing those things. I'm an artist. I create with my mind. Do you want me to write a paper on how to transform your backyard into a luscious oasis that will be an urban exotic locale for you host exquisite soirées that will undoubtedly make you the envy of your social ensemble? I can do that. If you would ask me to actually do it then you're in trouble. My first instinct would be to ask, "Are you sure?" then question that person's judgement. And also wonder why they don't know more people that could do something like that. You know that there is something called the Yellow Pages or the Internet where you can look up people who can do these things, right? Just checking.
Most people who know me understand that I should be the last person you call for help with physical stuff. I'm ok with that. I wouldn't call me either, not even if I was desperate But the people who do keep asking me are my parents. It's like I owe them or something and they think that I can somehow repay that debt. Have you learned nothing from my 32 years of existence? I guess not. But every now and then I come through and actually do a good job. Like that time I cleaned out my Dad's garage. Or that time when I helped James paint the fence. Or when I set up the Christmas light display on the outside of Mom's house. But the one that I am most proud of is back in late May of 2011 when I dug out a garden in my Mom's backyard. The picture up on the top is what it looks like today with all of the flowers, a fountain and numerous trinkets that she has added to give her garden a little flair.
My cousin Brian helped me dig up part of the back yard and it was a lot more difficult than I had expected. We had to dig pretty deep so that we removed all of the grass, weeds and roots from whatever was previously growing there so that it was just soil. After that we lined the garden area with these giant stones and filled it in with planting soil. I also put in these stone blocks that the fountain sits on and had to make sure that the entire area was level so that the fountain worked correctly. My Mom planted all of the flowers and made it look beautiful but she couldn't have done that without Brian and I. We moved a lot of earth too on a very hot day. I'm not used to actual work so I was hurting pretty bad afterwards. But now I'm thankful I did it and also quite proud of my work. I like to sit in the backyard, listen to the slow babble of the fountain and reflect on my life. It's like a little oasis where people can gather to share stories and enhance their relationships through mutual care and respect. So I guess I can write about it AND do it as well. Who would've thought.
I should've thought. I don't give myself nearly enough credit. I'm a whole lot better at just about everything than I think I am. I have a real problem with confidence and self-esteem and all of that psychological mumbo jumbo and it trickles down into every aspect of my life. I also don't think 4th dimensionally. I have a real problem with that too. I need to stop being so down on myself and just go out there and kick ass every day. I rule. And there's no one on this planet that can tell me otherwise. Sure, I am my biggest fan and no one listens to my kickass podcasts or reads all of this stuff that I spend countless hours putting together, but so what? Why should it matter if I don't have an audience? I know the truth. I'm freakin' amazing at everything I put my heart and efforts into. I need to be happy with myself and remember that if I put my mind to it, I can accomplish anything. Just like Doc always said. He might have been seen as a crackpot scientist but Doc Brown is a genius. I only hope that you see me in the same light. Come back tomorrow for another pickle that might either enlighten you or make you shake your head in confusion. Who knows what will happen because I've got a whole jar of them just waiting to be shared.
- pookon -
https://twitter.com/pookondotcom
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